Everyone Hates Me
by HomozygousBean
Summary: Ivan Braginski is hated by the whole school, mostly because of his sexuality. But is he wrong? Does someone actually care? Human AU. Rated M for language and dirty thoughts, as of right now. There will probably be more in future chapters.
1. Aru!

I glanced at the watch on my wrist. Only ten more minutes.

The detention room was silent, only containing Mr. Rodgers and myself. I sighed and pulled out a sheet of paper and a pencil to prepare to draw.

I'd already done all my homework, including the extra credit that I didn't even need to do, and studied for all upcoming tests. I'd run out of things to do.

Nobody really knew, but I really liked to draw. And I was mildly good at it.

I twirled the stubby pencil around with my large fingers until inspiration struck me. I began drawing the outlines. _A circle here, two lines there, half circle there... _I had begun to start on the details when I heard a loud crack in front of me.

Mr. Rodgers, a chubby, balding man, was standing in front of me, ruler in hand.

"Sir?" I asked quietly. He looked at my sketch and raised an eyebrow.

"You like drawing?" I nodded my head.

"Da."

I suddenly became worried. _Was that wrong? _I couldn't know, I'd just moved here from Russia a month ago. I swallowed.

"Briganski, you may go." I let out a small sigh of relief and leaned down to grab my things.

"But first..." I froze.

"Why don't you let anyone know about your drawing skill?" I slumped my shoulders.

"People will make fun of me. More than they do now, anyway..." I mean, a huge, Russian man drawing? It was weird. Mr. Rodgers put a hand on my shoulder.

"I understand, son. But be proud of your talent. Join the art class, at least." I sighed sadly.

"Da, sir. I'll try." He gave me a weak smile and walked back over to his desk.

"I hope you learned your lesson, Briganski." I silently rolled my eyes. Wasn't even my fault. He started it... But I kept my mouth shut and gathered my things and shoved them into my bag.

"Goodbye Briganski. Be good." I hooked my backpack and threw it over my shoulder.

"Bye." I said simply and wrapped my scarf around my neck.

Even though it was nearly summer, I still wore my scarf. Nobody could see my neck.

I exited the tiny classroom and made my way down the hallway. I yanked the cell phone from my pocket as soon as I left school grounds. Twenty new messages. _Damn_.

I sighed. Why did I even have a dad? It's not like he ever takes care of us. Yekaterina does all the work. _Dad is going to kick my ass when I get home... _

Suddenly, I crashed into something. I reeled back, not knowing what I even hit.

"Ow! Watch where you're going, aru!" Was the respose for me.

A small, Chinese man with his long silky hair pulled into a ponytail, was seething at Ivan.

"O-oh! I'm so s-sorry! I-I wasn't paying attention!" I quickly apologized. The small man visibly relaxed and huffed.

"Just watch where you're going. No need to apologize." He leaned down to pick up some bags that he'd dropped when smacking into me. I crouched down to help him.

"I'm so sorry sir, my dad was-"

"Yao. And stop apologizing." I nodded, picking up a package of frozen mixed vegetables.

"Yao. You see, my dad was blowing up my phone, and I just didn't see you, da." He shrugged.

"Most people don't. My short body makes me hard to notice, I guess." I glanced at him at that. He was wearing a red longsleeve with sleeves that came way past his hands._ His lithe body made those tight pants look so good... _I snapped the thought out of my mind.

"So, what's your name?" Yao asked me. I blushed. How did I forget to tell him my name?

"Ivan. I go to school down the road there." I pointed at where I came from. He nodded.

"I know. I go there too. I'm a sophmore. Aren't you a freshman?" I gulped. He must think I'm really stupid and weird and queer because everyones hates me at that goddamned school.

I nodded slowly.

"Why are you so shy?" I froze. Nobody's ever asked me that.

"Everyone hates me." He picked up the last package and stood up. He looked at me and raised an eyebrow.

"I don't hate you."

I blushed and fought for words. "B-but we just met and y-you can't know, especially since-"

"Oh would you just shut up for a minute?" Yao interrupted.

I pressed my lips together. I'm surprised he's even talked to me this long. Most people are afraid of me because of my large build and scary accent. Yao continued.

"I have no reason to hate you right now." He stated simply.

"But I'm gay!" I blurted out. I immidiatley clamped my mouth shut. That's why everyone hates me. _Because I'm gay. _

Yao bursted out laughing. I frowned. Did I say something funny?

"Oh, boy you're clueless." I pulled my eyebrows together. _Did I miss something? _

"It really doesn't matter if your gay or not. Especially to me. You know that guy Alfred? Yeah he's definetly gay. Probably lets that English weirdo suck him off every weekend..." Yao said, still smiling a bit.

_Alfred. He's the guy that put me in detention. Suck off? Isn't that..? _My eyes widened and I blushed.

"O-oh. I'm sorry." Yao rolled his eyes.

"Enough with the apologizing already. Will you help me carry these?" He gestured towards the bags in his arms. I nodded quickly.

"Da, of course." I grabbed a couple bags from his arms and held them.

"I only live down the street, aru." I nodded and followed the small man.

When we arrived, we were in front of a small apartment. Yao set down his bags and fished out his keys from his pocket. When he opened up his door, inside revealed a comfy looking room. Red was everywhere.

I followed Yao inside to a kitchen island and set down the bags.

"Thank you for your help, Ivan. I'm not sure I would've gotten it done without you. I appreciate it." I quickly nodded.

"Da, of course I'm glad to help." Yao pulled out a notepad and ripped out a page and scribbled something on it before handing it to me.

"This is my number. Call or text me when you want." I blushed. _Nobody's ever given me their number... _I blinked and nodded.

"Thank you." Yao nodded and showed me to the door.

"See ya around, Ivan." He said before shutting the door.

I stood outside for a second.

I smiled happily for once in a long time.


	2. I Have His Number

I started walking home. As I was walking, I pulled out my phone. Still twenty new messages. I sighed and opened the messages.

_Where are you? _

_You're late. _

_Answer me you gay whore. _

_I'm gonna kick your ass..._

There were so many...

I shook my head and pocketed the phone. I decided not to worry about it right then. Right then, all that was on my mind was Yao.

_Who was he? Why wasn't he afriad of me? Why did he even give a fuck about me? _

I arrived at the apartment. It was a shitty apartment that had lots of criminal activity. But it was all we could afford.

I opened the door to see my scowling dad.

"So you finally decided to show up, huh?" I swallowed.

"Dad, this guy picked a fight and I-"

"Oh so you had detention? What'd you do, fuck the guy?" I was past used to my dad's taughting.

I held back a retort and said simply, "No."

He snorted.

At that exact moment, Yekatrina decided to walk in.

"Would you two stop bickering?" By now, Kat had surpassed my father in power. She was the one keeping a roof over our heads, so my dad stepped down.

"But he-"

"I don't fucking care. I have a headache and I'm not in the mood. Ivan, you got detention?" I looked down and nodded. She let out a sigh.

"Is this your first time?" I looked up. She was pinching the bridge of her nose.

"Mmhm." was all I said. She nodded.

"Okay. Then you're off the hook. But if I catch you one more time.." She didn't even have to finsh. I nodded quickly. She turned to Dad.

"Go get some fucking booze and leave us alone, okay?" My dad nodded begrudgingly and went to the kitchen to get something to drink.

Kat gave me a stern eye and grabbed my wrist, pulling me to her bedroom. She sat me down on her bed and locked the door behind us.

There wasn't much to her room. A twin size bed in the corner, a cheap wooden bureau to the left of it and a desk in another corner.

She sat cross-legged next to me.

"Give me the story. Now." I sighed and began talking.

_"Oi! Fag! Over here!" _

_I heard the call from that stupid American in the hallway. I continued walking, ignoring the attention lover. _

_He roughly grabbed my shoulder and forced me to face him. _

_"What." I asked coldly. _

_"What? On your way to suck off another guy?" He asked, smirking. _

_"No. Leave me alone." I turned to walk away, only to be yanked back by Alfred again. _

_"Where you goin', gay-wad?" I glared at him. _

_"Away. Let go of me." _

_He sneered, "Make me." _

_I threw my books on the, making a loud noise and stood up to the obnoxious boy. _

_Alfred growled and shoved me. I grabbed his arm and wrenched it behind his back. _

_"How's it feel, huh?" I snarled. _

_Alfred growled and kicked behind, hitting my leg, and unbalancing me. _

_By now, we had attracted a large crowd. _

_He took the moment to escape from my grip. He turned to face me. He punched at me. I dodged and grabbed his wrist again. I took the chance to punch him in the jaw. _

_Alfred reeled back, clutching his jaw. He started to charge at me when a teacher stepped in and grabbed both our wrists roughly. _

_She led us to the office, where punishments were delt. _

I sighed when I finished. Kat looked at me, concern in my eyes.

"I'm so sorry, brother. I didn't know it was that bad..." I shook my head.

"It's okay. I think I won anyway." I smiled. She laughed and nodded.

"Yes, I do believe you did." I looked away, still smiling.

"And plus.." I stopped. _Should I tell her? _

"What?"

_Well I guess I don't have a choice anymore. _

"I ran into someone on my way here. Literally. I smacked into him while I was looking at Dad's messages."

Kat burst out laughing.

"I'm serious! But you wanna know the best part?" She stopped laughing and looked at me intently.

"Hmm?" She asked, curious. I smiled.

"He wasn't afraid or intimidated by me. But he was seething! He didn't even think twice about my body size!" She smiled. I continued.

"But I helped him pick up his groceries and we started talking-"

"Is this why you were so damn late?" Kat interrupted me. I blushed and nodded. She smiled.

"Go ahead and continue." I nodded again.

"We talked, and turns out he's a sophomore at my school. And he doesn't hate me." I grinned happily.

"He also gave me his number." Kat gasped excitedly.

"Oh my God, brother's gonna have a boyfriend!" She exclaimed happily. I quickly covered her mouth.

"Not so loud! Dad might hear and I'll never hear the end of it." She nodded and I removed my hand.

She grinned. "What's his name?" I bit my lip.

"Yao."

She smirked. "Yao, huh? Already sounds sexy." I screeched.

"Kaaat!" She giggled. "You're so easy to embarass." I pouted a little and she smiled and ruffled my hair.

"C'mon brother, let's go eat dinner." I nodded and stood up and followed her out of the room.

Natalia was already out in the kitchen, setting up the table. My dad was nowhere in sight. I raised an eyebrow at Natalia. She shrugged.

"He went into his room with multiple bottles of liquor earlier."

I shugged as well and sat down to eat the cheap box-recipe food Yekatrina had so thoughtfully cooked.


	3. She's Dead

I stared down at the phone in front of me. The screen had Yao's number at the top, and no other text. I sighed.

I had no clue what to say.

_Hi_?

_Hey ya_?

_Yo mutha fucker_?

Okay not the last one.

I groaned. How the fuck do people do this?

I decided to go with a simple _Hi._

I hit the "SEND" button and set the phone next to me on the bed. Immediately, it buzzed. I blinked and picked it up again.

"**ONE NEW MESSAGE**"

I tapped the message and laughed at the reply.

_Who is this aru? _

Then I facepalmed at my stupidity. How did I forget to say who it was?

_It's Ivan, sorry._

I got another reply.

_Oh. U should've said it was u..._

I smiled.

_Sorry. How are you?_

I heard a quiet knock at my door, followed by a soft voice.

"Big brother?"

I put my phone on my nightstand and opened the door. Outside stood Natalia.

"Da, what is it?" I asked. She looked down.

"May I come in?" I nodded and stepped aside to let her in. She walked over to my bed and sat down. I closed the door and locked it and then sat by Natalia on my bed.

"Brother?" I looked at her. She stared down at her clasped hands.

"Do you still love me? Even though you only love men? Does that mean you don't love me?" I sighed and hugged my little sister.

"Of course I love you Natalia. Just because I like men doesn't mean I don' t love my family." I felt her relax and she put her hand on my arm.

"Thank you." Suddenly, my phone buzzed. I jumped up to grab it, but Nat beat me to it.

She picked up my phone and glared at it.

"Who's 'Yao'?" She asked suspiciously. I reached to grab it from her hands put she held it out of my reach.

"He's just a friend. Please give me my phone back, Natalia." She raised an eyebrow.

"'He'?"

I growled.

"He's just a friend." I repeated. She smiled and handed me my phone.

"Okay. Don't get into any more trouble, brother." She winked at me and walked out of my room.

I pouted to myself and looked at the message Yao sent.

_I'm fine. Would u like to go out sometime?_

I smiled. It's been two days since I ran into Yao. _And he's the only thing that's been on my mind since. _

_Da that sounds great. Where do you wanna go? _

I yawned and leaned back onto the pillows. It was about 7:30 PM. My phone buzzed again.

_How about the coffee shop around the corner of where we met?_

I thought for a minute about the location then nodded to myself.

_Yeah I think I know where that is. What time? _

There was a long pause before the next reply.

_Do u think u could meet me there now?_

I raised my eyebrows at the reply.

_I don't know. I'd have to ask my sister. Why? _

Another long pause.

_I need to get away. Plz ask your sister._

Now I was concerned. But I said anyway, _Okay. Give me a second._

I sat up and exited the room and headed towards Yekatrina's.

"Kat?" I knocked softly on her door. I heard yelling on the other side of the door.

"I'm not fucking interested in you, you whore! Leave me alone!" I heard a phone slam shut and figured another guy had gotten a hold of Kat's number and wanted in her pants.

I knocked again. "Kat, can I come in please?" I heard some shuffling and then the door opened to reveal a ruffled Kat.

"Sorry some guy got my number. Come in." I walked over to her bed and she sat down beside me.

"What is it? Is something wrong?" Worry dotted her eyes and I rushed to erase it.

"No, no I just have a question." She relax a bit.

"A friend asked if I could meet him at a coffee shop." She tilted her head.

"Right now?" I nodded.

"I think it's important. He said he 'needed to get away'." She nodded slowly.

"I suppose so... Promise to be careful?" I nodded vigorously.

"Da. Promise." She smiled a little and stood up.

"Okay. Be back before midnight or text if you want to stay later." She winked and I blushed.

"S-shut up!" She smiled and let me out of her room.

"Be good. See you later." I nodded and pulled out my phone.

_Headed out the door now._

I wrapped my scarf around my neck tightly and exited the apartment.

I rounded the corner to see the coffee shop Yao had been talking about. It was a tiny shop, but it attracted many people.

I entered the building and immediately felt a gust of cold air and heard a tingle of a bell over the door. I looked around the shop and saw a tiny-looking Yao huddled in a booth in the corner near the window.

I walked over and touched his shoulder. He jumped, obviously not noticing I was there, but looked at me and calmed.

"Oh. It's you. You're really, quiet, you know." I shrugged and took a seat in front of him.

The shop was mostly empty, except a few employees cleaning the tables or floors. I looked at Yao.

"So what was so bad that I had to come here?" Yao blinked and looked down.

"I'm sorry to trouble you. It's just..." His eyes welled up with tears and he brought his legs to his chest and put his head in his knees and sobbed into them. My eyes widened and I quickly got up and sat beside him and put my hand on his back.

"What... What happened, Yao?" He didn't look up, but he said into his knees,

"It's my mom.. she's... dead." I tensed up.

"She's... dead?" Another round of sobbing. I hugged him fiercely and I felt him relax a little. He put his arm around my back and put his face in my chest.

"She just died." He said into my shirt. I nodded, urging him on.

"She had cancer." He croaked.

"How long?" I asked softly. He choked up again, but forced it down.

"Two years." I rubbed his back, trying to soothe him.

Then I felt a tap on my shoulder. I turned around to see a waitress. She bit her lip and said quietly, "U-um, would you l-like something to d-drink, sir?" I sighed.

"Da. Black coffee please. And do you have any chocolate?" She glanced at Yao and nodded.

"Then some chocolate too. Thank you." She scribbled some things down and nodded and walked away.

"I don' t need anything..." Yao said softly.

"Too bad. Now continue." Yao pouted a little but continued.

"She'd been in the hospital for a month or so. I was at home, watching anime, when Kiku walked in and..." Tears formed in his eyes, but forced himself to continue.

"He told me that Mom had just died... And... and I can't-" He sobbed and clutched my shirt, pulling me close.

I'd just heard probably the worst thing that's ever happened to Yao. _Why me? _

I put my chin on top of his head and wrapped my long arms around him.

"Why'd you text me of all people?" I asked abruptly.

Yao hiccuped, "Bec-cause I thought y-you'd unders-stand."

I froze. I _did _understand. My mom had also died when I was really young. _But how'd he know that?_

"How'd you figure that?" I asked hesitantly.

The waitress then showed up with my coffee and Yao's chocolate.

"Here you go, sir." She put down the plastic tray and then looked at Yao with sympathy.

"It's on the house." She walked away before I could protest.

I sighed and took a sip of my coffee. Yao took a bar of chocolate and opened it carefully. He began nibbling on it and answered my question.

"When you were talking about your dad. If your mom had been there, she wouldn't let your father treat you like that." _Wow. He's right. _He continued.

"So I just took the chance that your mom had died, rather than walked out. I guess I was right."

He broke off a chunk of his chocolate and handed it to me. I hesitantly took it and put it in my mouth. Yao then cuddled into my chest again.

"I'm sorry if I seem clingy or weird. I promise I don't usually do this." I smiled.

"That's okay." I wrapped my arms around Yao.

"Can you tell me something about yourself?" Yao asked into my shirt.

I frowned. I suppose I had to, since he told me the worst thing that's ever happened to him. I nodded.

"I have two sisters and a jackass I still call my father." Yao giggled but I continued.

"My older sister, Yekatrina, keeps us alive, basically. She is constantly working and she is the boss, really. She is more powerful than my dad, even. Me, I'm just the one who is in school and managing to keep good grades. My youngest sister, Natalia, is too young to really do anything. She's only in grade school."

I paused.

"My mom... She died when I was seven. She had tuberculosis. My dad still gets overly drunk trying to forget her." I looked away. Yao scrunched up his eyebrows.

"What?" I sighed.

"I supposed I have to tell you something really important too. Do you want to know why I always keep this scarf on?"

Yao bit his lip. "You don't have to tell me if you aren't comfortable." I nodded.

"...Okay." Yao pulled away from my shirt.

"Thank you for coming. It really means a lot." I nodded.

"Of course." He hugged me suddenly. I slowly put my hand on the back of his head. He pulled away and looked at me curiously.

I frowned. "What?" He shook his head.

"Nothing. Just curious about you." I frowned deeper but stood up to let Yao out.

The waitress came over at that moment.

"Would you like that coffee to go, sir?" She asked me. I nodded. I wasn't going to sleep well that night anyway.

She grabbed my mug and went behind the counter to put the drink into a different container.

As we walked out, Yao tugged on my sleeve.

"Hmm?" I looked down at him. I swore I saw a blush creep over is face before he turned away.

"C-can you walk me home, aru?" He asked. I smiled and nodded. He smiled back and turned towards his apartment.

I walked beside him the whole time.

When we arrived at his apartment, Yao turned and looked at me.

"Thank you." He said quietly and disappeared behind the door.


	4. When Did He Get So Brave?

I grumbled on my way to school.

I was definetly not looking foward to today. Alfred was probably going to try to pick a fight again and the entire school was going to hate me more because of the _first _fight.

I groaned aloud.

But as I arrived at the school, hateful looks were thrown my way, but smiles were also thrown.

I was confused. _Fighting is not good. Why are people smiling? _

I shook the self discussion from my head and started towards first period. I found the door I was looking for, but outside of it stood a Yao.

I rushed up to him.

"Yao, what are you-"

"You curious as to why people are smiling at you?" He interrupted.

His gaze was towards the ground, so I couldn't read his expression. I nodded slowly. He pulled out his phone and turned it so I could see what was on his screen. On the screen was a picture of Yao and myself.

It was us at the coffee shop, Yao cuddled into my chest and my long arms around him. I squinted at the screen.

"Who took that?" I asked.

Yao looked at me for the first time. His mouth showed a small smile.

"Kiku took it. He's my younger brother. He must've known that I'd run off to the coffee shop and came to get me, but found us like that instead." I bit my lip.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean-"

"Why the hell are you apologizing." He stated blankly. "You seriously think I'm mad at you?" I shrugged my shoulders.

"I thought you might be-"

"I'm not. I think it's cute. Even if we aren't dating."

I felt my heart sink. _Wait, why did my heart sink? I've only known him for a couple days! He has no reason to- _

"But I hope to change that one day." He interrupted my thoughts.

My eyes widened and I looked at him, a blush creeping it's way across my face.

"W-what- are y-you-What?" I fumbled for words.

Yao laughed and reached up to ruffle my hair. "You sure are shy. I gotta get to class. Don't fight any idiots while I'm gone."

He winked at me and walked off in adifferent direction. I ran a hand through my hair before walking into the classroom. _Oh boy..._

As soon as I knew I was out of sight, I sighed and leaned against a wall.

_Jeez, how does he do that every time? I thought of his blushing face and melted in my skin again. How do you fall in love with someone after meeting them just a few days ago? _

I smiled and pushed my bangs out of my face.

_Alright, Yao, compose yourself... _

I took a deep breath and stood up striaght and walked towards my first class, thinking of excuse for my absense.

Luckily today I didn't run into any trouble. People were too scared to ask me I guess.

I had been rummaging through my locker when I felt a tap on my shoulder. I craned my head back to see who wanted to taunt me this time. It was Yao.

"Oh, privet, Yao. How did you find my locker?" He shrugged and smiled.

"It's easy to pick you out in a crowd. You stick out." He winked and I felt yet another blush present itself on my cheeks.

I pulled out what I was looking for and closed and latched the locker shut. I turned towards Yao.

"So what did you come here for?" I asked as normally as I could.

He smiled again. "Well, since you so kindly walked me home that night, I thought I'd walk you home today." He grinned and I bit my lip.

_Why does he do that? I think he knows it makes me melt... _I shook the thought away and nodded eagerly.

"Da, that seems fair." Yao giggled and started towards the exit. I followed.

"So what are some of your hobbies, aru?" Yao asked curiously. I scratched the back of my head nervously.

"Well... I like math and geography and-"

"No, no like things you do for fun. Not school, blech." He made a face and stuck out his tongue. I laughed. _I suppose I could tell him... _

"Well... I like to draw and paint."

Yao looked at me intently. "Really? That's so cool! Can you show me some of your paintings?"

I bit my lip. "Like, today?" He shrugged.

"Sure. I've go nothing that I have to do today." I bit the inside of my cheek.

"Well... I..."

I didn't want him to see my house or my dad. _I don't want him to ever meet my dad. _

"You don't have to if you aren't comfortable showing me, Ivan." I shook my head quickly.

"No, no that's not it. It's just...my dad..."

Yao stopped us, grabbing my arm and looking into my eyes.

"Is your dad...you know...homophobic?" Yao asked quietly.

I nodded slowly. "And he knows that I'm gay. I don't think you should come to my house, for your sake. Please." Yao nodded understandingly.

"Okay. Do you still want to show me some pictures? You grab some stuff and come over my place, if you want." I nodded.

"That sounds good. Why don't you wait at that coffee shop? I'll grab my things and meet you there." Yao nodded and started walking again.

"Sounds fine. I'll head that way now. See ya soon."

I smiled. "Bye."

He waved and turned and headed in another direction. I took a deep breath when I knew he was gone.

_Why and how does he want to even be around me, anyway..._

When I got home, I opened the door and looked around to see if anyone was home. As I walked in, I noticed Yekatrina in the kitchen, cleaning up.

I set my backpack down at the door and walked up to her.

"Hello, brother." She said, not stopping her cleaning.

I took a deep breath.

"Um, Kat?" She then stopped scrubbing one of the plates and looked at me.

"Yes?" I bit the inside of my cheek.

"Um... Can I go over a friend's...He wants to see my paintings and stuff.." I mumbled.

She grinned and nodded. "That's fine by me. I'll tell Dad you just had an afterschool practice."

I smiled widely and went around the counter to hug my sister.

She smiled and dried her hands to hug me back. She pulled back and gave me a stern face.

"If you're going to do anything serious while your there, just remember use protection." She grinned and ruffled my hair when my face turned bright red.

"S-shut up." I exited the kitchen and went into my room to gather some of my paintings.

I grabbed a duffle bag and shoved some of my best paints into it and made sure to stuff my new sketch in it.

When I went back out to the main room, Kat was still cleaning, but had been joined by Nat.

I went over to my sisters and I kissed Natalia on the head and hugged my older sister again.

"Call me if something goes wrong." I said to them as I waved my phone in the air.

I then slung the bag over my shoulder and left the apartment.

I headed towards the coffee shop where I'd had my meltdown.

_He can draw? _

_I wonder how good he is... _

_He's so handsome... _

_How the fuck did I pick up such a hottie? _

_I am not that good looking... _

I erased my thoughts and entered the little shop.

I'd first stumbled upon it when I got lost on my first day of grade school. I'd begged my mom to let me walk home, and she had been right. The owner of the shop, Roma Antiqua, helped me find my way back. He was nice.

I sighed out loud. It's been a while since then.

At that moment, that handsome Russian walked in, duffle bag thrown over his shoulder.

Though his neck still held that scarf.

Even though I put down his offer to tell me about it, I was still curious.

He saw me and smiled and rushed over to me.

"Hi." He said excitedly. I smiled widely and stood up.

"Hey. You look excited." He bit his lip and scratched the back of his neck.

"Well... I am..." I laughed and touched his big nose.

"Aw, so cute." He turned beet red and mumbled his thanks.

"Well c'mon. Let's head out." He nodded, excited again.

I suddenly thought about grabbing his hand. We exited the shop.

_Well, I mean, we've only known each other for a couple days... I shouldn't. He'd prob- _

I suddenly felt a hand fit into mine.

I glanced down at my hand and followed the other hand to Ivan. My cheeks turned bright red, but I didn't let go of his hand. He smiled at me and kept walking.

_When did he get so brave? _

I pushed away the thought and decided to just enjoy the moment.

His hand was very callused, but still soft. And warm. I felt like melting into the sidewalk right there, but decided to go against it.

I led him to my house where Kiku was not, because he was at Herakles'. I made sure that all of my siblings and parents were not there before I left the school. Just in case.

I dropped his hand, finally, and sadly, to fish out my keys from my backpack, which was still on my back.

I unlocked and opened the door for Ivan to let him in. He walked past me and set his bag down on the couch.

He looked around the room and then turned and asked me, "I forgot to ask. You really like red, don't you?"

I blushed, but nodded. "Yeah I suppose it's a bit much.."

Ivan shook his head. "No, no. I like it."

I smiled and said, "Here, you wanna come into my room?"

Ivan's eyes widened, but he nodded and grabbed his bag again. I started towards my room and heard Ivan's heavy footsteps behind me. I opened the door and quickly shut it, not wanting Ivan to see what was in there.

"Um...Do you mind if I clean up real quick?" Ivan nodded and readjusted the strap on his shoulder. I smiled and quickly entered the room, closing the door behind me.

I was quick to shove multiple books and papers under my bed. I grabbed the largest panda plushies and threw them into my closet, leaving only the smaller ones. I threw some of my clothes that had been strewn across the floor into a hamper in a corner.

I glanced around the room before nodding to myself and opening the door to let Ivan in.


	5. It's A Surprise

**Author's Notes:**

**So in the previous chapter my brain noped and I said that Yao's **_**parents **_**weren't home, and I meant to say **_**parent **_**or **_**dad**_**, sorry. Anyway, enjoy the chapter! ~mmbazb**

I heard the door open beside me and looked to see Yao poking his head out.

"You can come in now."

I nodded and opened the door to his room.

Inside beheld a comfy looking room with deep red walls and a large bed in the middle (red sheets of course) and a dresser to the right. A few panda plushies were scattered around the room.

I looked at Yao. "Nice room."

He smiled and sat down on his bed. "Okay, I'm so absolutely dying to see those paintings. Show me!"

He grinned and patted the spot next to him. I blinked and went to sit next to the excited teen. I set the bag down and kneeled in front of it and started pulling out multiple canvases and spreading them across the bed.

Yao just sat there, awestruck.

I pulled out the last painting, a painting of a family iceskating on a frozen lake, and looked at Yao.

He was staring at all the canvases. "These are amazing..." He murmured and touched a painting of a field of sunflowers. Many of my paintings contained sunflowers and Yao noticed. "You like sunflowers?"

I looked away and blushed. "Y-yeah."

He smiled and picked a small painting of my little sister.

"Who is this?" He asked curiously.

"That's Natalia. She's my younger sister. That was a few years ago, on her first day of grade school." He smiled and ran his fingers over all of them, awed. He touched my sketch from the other day and picked it up.

"What's this?" He asked.

I glanced at it and explained, "I started that right before we met. While I was in detention."

He laughed and nodded. "What were you going to draw?"

I bit my lip. "I-I was going to have it be like someone handing me a sunflower. I never finished it because I didn't know who it would be."

He tilted his head then nodded. "I see. These paintings are incredible, Ivan. You really have a gift."

I smiled and blushed a bit. I noticed Yao's eyes change for a split second, but the emotion was quickly repressed.

I frowned.

_Wonder... _

"Where'd you learn how to paint so well?" Yao pulled me from my thoughts.

"My mom used to. She taught me before she died. I taught myself the rest."

Yao looked at me with amazement.

I swore I heard him mumble something about 'handsome', but he shook his head and looked at the paintings again. He picked up an unfinished painting of a person.

I widened my eyes and quickly took it from his hands. "Uh, sorry I didn't realized I put this one in there."

Yao pouted and tried to look at the picture again but I shoved it into the bag. He can't see that. _I think I'd die of embarrassment. _

Yao's pout deepened and he crossed his arms. "Why can't I see it?"

I bit my bottom lip. "W-well b-because... it's...it's..." Yao raised an eyebrow.

I huffed. "It's you..."

Yao processed this, then blushed and smiled a bit.

I bit my lip. "I-I'm sorry that must be kind of creepy, but-"

"That's so sweet, Ivan. I don't see why you don't already have a boyfriend..."

I stared at the floor. _'But I hope to change that one day...' _

I hope he meant that.

I handed him the painting and he looked at it with awe still plastered on his face. He rubbed his thumb on the side of the canvas. He looked at me, and I figured out what had been in his eyes.

_Lust. _

I suppressed and smile and looked at my paintings on his bed. I picked up my favourite painting, a painting of a big blue rose.

Yao poked his head over the top of the painting, trying to get a glimpse of what I was looking at. I turned it around and Yao gasped.

"Oh, Ivan that's amazing! When did you draw that?" He asked curiously.

I smiled. "A couple days after I moved here. Did I ever tell you that I moved here from Russia a month ago?"

Yao cocked his head to the side. "No, I don't think you ever did. What inspired you to draw it?"

I looked into the distance, trying to remember that day.

"My older sister took me and Natalia to the park and there was a small bush of blue roses. I unpacked my painting supplies the very next day and went back out to draw it."

Yao smiled and touched my nose. "You're so incredible. Even if you're gay. Which I don't mind at all, by the way."

I pulled my eyebrows together. "Why doesn't it matter to you, anyway?"

Yao snorted. "First of all, there is not a single thing wrong with us. We are just like left-handed people, just more rare. We-"

"Wait, wait, are you saying you're gay too?" I asked incrediously.

Yao nodded. "Yes. And I'm currently raging about homophobics. Can I continue?"

I looked down and nodded.

He continued, "They think we're so different, and that scares them. We like the same gender, so what?" Yao stood up and started pacing the room. "The damned Christians all think that we are so impure and horrible. I hate it so much, aiyah!" He balled up his fists and squeezed his eyes shut. "It's not fair! You're being hated by almost the whole school and you're obviously suffering." I saw a fat tear roll down his cheek. "It's not fair..."

Yao walked over to me and sat next to me.

He looked at me. What I saw on his face was incredibly heartbreaking.

His mouth was crumpled in different ways and tears were streaming down his face at a rapid pace.

He sobbed, "You shouldn't h-have t go thro-ough this and I-I'm going to help you. I-I don't ca-are weather or not you want i-it."

I wrapped my arms around his small body and he pressed his head against my chest. "I'm okay, Yao. Please don't cry anymore..."

I had already started to feel my shirt get wet with his tears. He ceased to sob, but he kept sniffling. I rubbed his back and accidentally started to trace random pattern into his back. He either didn't notice, or didn't mind.

He sighed after a while and pulled away. "I'm sorry. I feel like I can be really open whenever I'm around you."

I shook my head. "Doesn't bother me. Makes me feel special, actually." I smiled.

He giggled and poked my stomach. "Silly."

I touched his hair. _I don't remember deciding to do that. _

_Oh well. _

It was silky and soft. His short bangs fluttered in the air conditioning that didn't really help with his growing blush.

He looked at me and I retracted my hand. "S-sorry. I didn't realize-"

"You apologize way too damn much. I'm hungry. Wanna go make something?" I frowned and glanced at my watch.

_Oh. _It was after six PM.

"Won't your dad be home soon though?" I asked nervously.

Yao shook his head. "No. He went on a business trip. Kiku is with his boyfriend, Herakles. We're alone."

He smiled. "So what do you want to make? It can be anything. We have tons of food."

I thought for a minute. Well...

"Do you know how to make beef stragonoff?"

Yao's eyes lit up. "Yes, I do actually. Can you help me make it?"

I nodded. "Da. Are you sure you have all the ingredients?"

Yao tapped his chin then nodded. "From what I remember from a beef stragonoff recipe, yes, I do believe we have all the ingredients."

I smiled. "Let's do it then."

By the time we finished, there were extra vegetables all over the counters and floors and beef fat was dotted all over the stovetop. Ivan kept cutting the vegetables too thick so I would grab his wrist and guide his hand, as a demonstration. But I kept forgetting to mix the beef so the meat was a bit crispy, but it was still nice to try to make some authentic Russian food.

We spooned some food from the warm pots into our bowls and sat down to try it. Ivan made me have the first bite.

"You need to have it first. I've lived in Russia most of my life, so I know what it tastes like. So you get to try first."

I glared at him but shoved a spoonful into my mouth anyway. My eyes widened and I nodded excitedly.

"It tastes so good!" I said through a mouthful of food. "Try it!"

He smiled and put a spoonful into his mouth and nodded. "S' good." He said.

I smiled and continued eating my meal happily.

"So did you come here from China?" Ivan asked curiously.

I swallowed and smiled while nodding. "Yeah. I was only five when we moved here though." I smiled again. "I loved China. I miss it."

Suddenly, Ivan's eyes lit up. He smiled and looked at his plate and continued eating.

I frowned. "What's got you so excited?"

He smiled wider and shook his head. "It's a surprise."

I pouted and glared at him. He laughed and continued eating his food.

I sighed and continued eating as well.

I laid down on the couch and stretched my arms and legs.

"So what do you wanna do next?" I asked happily.

Ivan shrugged and sat down at the end of my feet. Then his eyes lit up again. "Do you have an unused canvas?"

I squinted. "Kiku might have one. Why?"

He just smiled. "Just wanna start on that surprise." He winked and I felt a blush creep over my face.

"H-here I'll show you to his room..." I got back up from the couch and led him towards my little brother's room.

He followed and I opened the curtains (yes, curtains) to his room and walked over to his desk to rummage around. I eventually found an 8x10 inch canvas and handed it to him.

"Am I allowed to watch?"

He shook his head. "Nope. Gotta pencil?"

I turned back around and grabbed a pencil from a can to hand to him.

He smiled. "Thanks."

I nodded and went back out to the livingroom. I laid back down on the couch and Ivan sat on the floor in front of me and started scribbling something on the Royal and Langnickel canvas. I didn't have a clue what he was trying to draw so I grabbed the remote and flicked on the TV.

Immediately, an anime show popped up. I'd last been on Netflix, and the show I was watching was still up.

Ouran Highschool Host Club.

I thought of the pros and cons of letting Ivan see such a gay-filled anime and decided to play it, mostly because he wasn't paying much attention to anything but the canvas.

The Hitachiin twins immediately started talking in their fluent language of Japanese. I had to hold back a fanboy scream. They were so cute.

_Not as cute as the large man in front of me... _

I shoved the thought away and continued watching the anime. Ivan only glanced up a couple times to check on me, but continued scribbling indecipherable lines.

I decided to tell Kiku that I was letting Ivan have his canvas.

I grabbed my phone, which was on the side table.

I pulled up Kiku's contact and texted him, _Hey Kiku? _

It was another minute or two when I got a message back.

_Not right now. _

I frowned and texted him back hastily.

_What do you mean, not now aru? _

There was an immidiate respose this time.

_Because I'm TRYING to orgasm here! _

My face reddened up and I texted back.

_Jeez, sorry to interrupt... Just wanted to tell u that Ivan's using ur 8x10 canvas... _

I saw a shadow cross my phone. I looked over my shoulder to see Ivan looking at the messages. I quickly snapped my phone shut.

"I was just telling Kiku that you were using his canvas. Nothing to worry about."

Ivan looked at my face. "Then why is your face red?"

I pouted and turned away. "B-because apparently, Kiku is doing something."

Ivan shook his head and went back to sit down. "I'm not even gonna ask..."

I smiled and continued watching my anime.

"Okay, text me when you get home please, Ivan." Yao said worriedly.

I laughed and nodded. "Of course, of course. But I'll be fine. I'll see you later."

He smiled and waved as I exited the door.

"Bye." He said.

I waved and wrapped my scarf tighter around my neck. "Bye." I turned and headed off towards my apartment.

It was 8:00 at night and I hadn't gotten any frantic calls from Yekatrina or Natalia, so that was definitely good.

When I arrived at the shitty apartment I call home, I didn't hear yelling or crying, and I let out a sigh of relief. When I opened the door, no chaos was to be seen.

As I headed to my room, duffle bag over my shoulder, Kat exited her room, a look of exhaustion on her face.

She looked at me and smiled. "Hi brother. Did you have fun at Yao's?"

I nodded happily. "Da. Thank you for letting me go over. We made beef stragonoff. It was so good."

Kat's face lit up and she nodded. "Oh, that's amazing! Did it taste at all like Mom's?"

I nodded. "A little. So did Dad give you any shit?" I asked nervously.

She shook her head, thankfully. "No, I got him drunk as hell as soon as he walked in the door. He's passed out in his room as we speak. Go to bed, brother. It's late."

I suddenly felt the lull of sleep overwhelm me and I nodded.

Then I remembered something. "Oh, I saved you some beef stragonoff. Here."

I reached into my bag and pulled out a plastic container full of the authentic Russian food.

Yekatrina's eyes widened and I handed her the container. Her lip wobbled and she said, her voice cracking, "Oh, Ivan... Thank you. This is really sweet."

I smiled. "I'd noticed you haven't been eating as much so Nat and I could have more. I figured you needed something real."

Kat nodded and hugged me. "Thank you."

She said softly. "You're welcome."

I pulled away and went into my room, leaving Yekatrina to heat up the lefetovers.

When I got into my room, I dumped the contents of my bag onto my bed. I grabbed the two unfinished paintings and put them in a safe place. The rest were carefully put under my bed, in a cardboard box. I threw the empty bag into my closet and then flopped onto my bed.

I carefully unwrapped the precious scarf from my neck and stood up to look in the mirror.

_Scars. _

_Scars everywhere. _

And I know exactly what caused them.

_Me._

**Author's Notes:**

**Okaaaay so this is really long... Lol. Anyway, beef stragonoff. It's an actual Russian cusine that's very good. And Royal and Langnickel. That is an actual company that has really good art supplies, and I recommend it to all artists. Well, thanks everybody and have a nice day! ~mmbazb **


	6. Finding Nemo?

**A/N: OMG I'M SO SORRY FOR THE LATE UPDATE PLEASE EXCUSE ME I GOT IN HUGE TROUBLE AND WAS STRIPPED FROM ANY ELECTRONIC DEVICE. Anyway, please enjoy this chapter! **

**I keep forgetting to say this: Hetalia and it's characters belong to Hidekaz Himaruya only. Not me. **

"VANYA?"

I tore my eyes from the canvas.

"Da?"

"Will you come in here please?"

I sighed and stood up and exited my room. I went into the small livingroom where my older sister was waiting for me. She was sitting on the couch, looking exhausted.

She looked at me pleadingly. "Could you _please please please _do the dishes? I'm so tired."

I nodded quickly. "Of course. You should go to bed, Kat. Dad's asleep. I'll be fine."

She smiled softly. "Alright. Holler if you need me. Goodnight."

"Night."

She stood up and made her way to her room. I then went to the sink, which was full of dirty dishes and... beer bottles? I sighed. _Dad. Jackass. _I didn't mind doing the dishes for Kat, I just couldn't stand my father.

I sighed again and started to scrub a greasy plate. We didn't have the money to afford a dishwasher, because ours was broken when we moved in, so we have to hand-scrub them.

Suddenly, my phone buzzed from my back pocket. I dried my hands and pulled my phone from my back pocket.

Yao.

I smiled and checked the message.

_ When can I see the painting?_

I laughed a little and replied,

_ Never._

An immediate response.

_ EXCUSE ME ARU?_

I held back a bark of laughter.

_ I'm just kidding. I'll show it to you when I'm done. _

_ U said that 3 weeks ago aru. How long does it take u to paint something?_

_ Paintings can't be rushed. And I'm almost done anyway. _

_ REALLY?_

_ Yes. _

_ Promise to show it to me when ur done?_

_ Yes. _

I pocketed the phone again and continued washing the dishes. Yes, it had been around three weeks since I started the painting and Yao is as impatient as ever. No way was I showing him the painting before it was finished. I have a tendency to make my paintings look ugly at the start, and I don't want Yao to make fun of me. My dad does that.

I quickly finished washing the dishes and put them away. I glanced at our kitchen. Nothing much to it. Just a small area with small counter space and a stove and sink. It smelled. I decided to clean the kitchen tomorrow for Yekaterina. She has been working a lot of overtime. They had better pay her for that.

I headed to my room, where my unfinished painting sat. It was true, my painting was almost done. I just needed to add a couple final touches. I might finish it tonight. Who knows.

I yawned. Oh. I didn't realize how tired I was. I picked up the painting. I really wanted to finish it. I shook my head. I was going to finish it. Yao really wanted to see it, so I couldn't let him down, right?

I nodded to myself and sat back on my bed to finish it.

~Couple of hours later~

_ There._ Now it's done. I set the painting down and looked at it from a distance. I hope Yao will like it. I felt my eyes get droopy from drowsiness and I glanced at my phone for the time. 11:53 PM. Jeez, I needed to sleep. I had school tomorrow.

~Next Day~

I felt a light tap on my shoulder and I whirled around. I smiled brightly at who it was.

"Ivan!" I said excitedly.

He smiled and reached behind him. "Hey, I got something for you."

He reached into his backpack and pulled out a canvas.

My eyes widened and I jumped up and down excitedly. "Lemme see lemme see lemme seeeeee~"

Ivan blushed. "Y-you're making a scene..." He said quietly.

I shook my head. "Who cares? I wanna see."

He nodded and handed me the painting.

I was speechless.

Holding in my hands was a painting of two people walking under an umbrella on a rainy sidewalk. The sidewalk was illuminated with orange glowing light poles. The trees which were around the light poles were glowing with orange. The street to the left was a royal blue, standing in grand contrast to the orange. The two people under the umbrella were facing their backs to us, and were obviously men.

I cupped a hand over my mouth.

_ This was the surprise he was working on? _

I felt tears well up in my eyes.

I took the hand from my mouth to say softly, "This. Is. Amazing."

He smiled sheepishly and scratched the back of his neck. "Heh, thanks. I stayed up all night last night finishing it for you."

I felt the tears stream down my face. "F-for me?"

Ivan's eyes widened. "Y-yeah, why are you crying? Does it look bad?"

I shook my head and smiled. "No, it's just that nobody's ever done this for me. This is absolutely _amazing_, Ivan. You have a _real_ talent. You could make so much money off this."

Ivan frowned. "I don't understand what's so good about it, but thank you."

I almost punched him. "Ivan Braginski,this is by far the most amazing painting I've ever held in my hands. Don't say that."

Ivan blushed and nodded. I nodded back and closed my locker. "C'mon it's almost time for class. Let's go."

~During class~

I sighed and rested my chin in my cupped hand as my teacher slid a DVD into a DVD player. It was nearing the end of the school year so most of the teachers were just playing movies while they graded exams. The movie was called Finding Nemo. I didn't really understand the name of the movie. I sighed again and watched the movie anyway, since I didn't want to draw with the class around me. I really wished Yao was in the same class as me.

The movie started out kinda funny, but quickly went to horror. This was a children's movie? I shook my head and continued watching. Timehop. Ohhhhhh Nemo's a _name_... Why would you name your child that? Americans... Okay so fish go to school too? Oh, it's crustaceans too. Why a stingray? Wouldn't the fish just float right off unless they were like, strapped down or something? Dude, do fish have swimming lessons or something? How wouldn't they be capable to swim? Haha, butt. Butt... Yao... Mmm... I wonder...

I suddenly felt myself get uncomfortable... Down there.

_F-fuck... _

I quickly thought of gross things.

Lima beans.

Alfred.

Women.

Mold.

Fleas.

Puke.

Blood.

I felt the lump in my pants go down and I relaxed.

Fuck, just the mere _thought_ of Yao gets me hard? Damn it.

I scratched the back of my neck as I tried to continue to watch the movie. I couldn't. I just couldn't get Yao off my mind. Just a few weeks after meeting him and I want him. Maybe my dad is right. Maybe I am a whore. Man...

I laid my head on my desk and tried to get some sleep. I covered my head with my arms and closed my eyes.

After a while, I felt like I was being watched. I lifted my head and looked behind me, where an Alfred immediately looked away, a slight red tinging his cheeks.

The shrill of the bell stopped me from staring.

_ W-was he...?_ I decided to figure it out later.

**A/N: Okay I'm sorry this is short but I have like, a HUGE writers block right now. -_- You guys can PM me what you want to happen next and I'll do that bc I seriously can't think of what to do next. Oh, and I had totally forgot what the "surprise" was going to be so I just found a picture on Google. BTW, the pic doesn't belong to me. Just so we're clear. If I can get enough things to do, I might post the next chapter really soon, so PM me. It can be anything, it's rated M for God's sake... (PM ONLY PLZ) Just give me something to write. -_- Thanks.**

**~mmbazb **


	7. Last Thirty Seconds

** AN: OMFG I'M SO SAD. I GOT LIKE 0 PMS. It doesn't really matter, but I was just hoping... meh. Ugh I still have writers block so if this chapter is bad, I am sorry. If you're reading this, PLEASE check out my page. I love when people give me something to write aboot and plz don't feel like you're controlling me bc I don't even care. I like making people happy. BTW, I have an idea for another fanfiction. I'll tell you at the bottom bc most people don't care about this and I have to finish this so... ENJOY!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or its characters, otherwise there would b SO much yaoi...**

_ Buzz._

I groaned and sat up to look at my phone. Who the _fuck_ was texting me _this _late at night?

Yao. Of course.

_ IVAN I HAVE AN IDEA FOR TOMORROW._

Was the text message I'd just gotten from the small Chinese man.

_ Yao, it's so late, can we talk about it tomorrow? I was almost asleep..._

_ No, we have to talk about it now. _

_ Fine... What's your "great" idea?_

_ Don't u dare air quote my idea. I don't show every person I meet to this place aru. _

This immediately got my attention.

_ What's this place then?_

_ I'll take you after school._

I tilted my head. Why won't he tell me?

_ Alright. See you then. Now leave me alone and go to sleep please. _

_ Whatever aru. Night._

_ Night. _

I smiled and put my phone back on my nightstand and put my head on the pillow. He's always been a mystery. There's no changing that.

I found myself tossing and turning for the next half hour or so, fantasizing where he'll be taking me. Why won't he tell me? Is it secret? Who has he showed it to?

I sighed and tried to control and calm my thoughts so I could sleep. Tomorrow was the last day of school and Yao and I wanted to find some way to celebrate it. I had no clue what to do, since I'd only moved here about two months ago. I was glad Yao found something.

I finally found a comfortable position and fell asleep.

~Next morning~

I sat up and stretched as I yawned. Last day of school. Finally. I smiled and rubbed my eyes. Ivan was going to love the place I'm taking him. I'd gone to this place on the last day of school since I was in the fourth grade. But this time, I wouldn't be alone. I smiled wider and got off my bed. I couldn't wait to see Ivan.

~At School~

"BOO!" I screamed behind Ivan.

He jumped and sucked in a breath. "_Svyatoye der'mo_."

He turned around and saw that it was me and relaxed.

I smiled and laughed. "Wow, did I _actually_ scare you?"

He pouted but nodded. "You scared the crap out of me."

I pinched his cheeks and said, "Awww poor Ivan. What was it that you just said, anyway?"

His eyes widened and he shook his head, "Doesn't matter."

My smile went away and I frowned. "Now you _have_ to tell me."

Ivan crossed his arms and huffed. "They're Russian curse words, okay?"

I smiled and punched his arm lightly. "You're so shy. You can cuss around me, I don't care."

He blushed and looked down and nodded. I laughed and grabbed his arm. "C'mon, let's go to the front door. Our school likes to end the year like they do in _The Perks Of Being A Wallflower_. It's pretty cool."

He nodded and followed me.

~Ivan~

I don't even know what that was, but I was assuming it was a movie. I'd have to watch it when I get the chance. Maybe they would have it on Netflix. Oh and they did, in fact, pay Kat for the extreme overtime she'd been working, so now we could afford some better things, such as Netflix and a new dishwasher. I was glad for Netflix, because now I could watch movies, TV shows, and animes that Yao recommended. I was very happy.

Yao continued to pull me towards the front doors of the school where a large crowd was forming. Suddenly, everyone began to chant from 30 down, seconds-wise. They were all staring at a clock on the wall, right above the door, counting down the last few seconds of the school year. I heard Yao practically _screaming_ the numbers and I smiled, looking at the older teen.

Yao looked at me and smiled back and grabbed my hand, raising it in the air for the last 5 seconds.

"_FIVE..._

_ FOUR..._

_ THREE..._

_ TWO..._

_ ONE!"_

The shrill of the bell could barely be heard of the screams of the four years of highschoolers.

Everyone bust through the front door and ran outside, screeching their cries of joy. Most were the seniors, who are finally graduating. The others were just happy to get out of this hell hole for two months, starting with me. As soon as everything cleared, Yao grabbed my wrist yet again and pulled me out of the school.

The Earth decided to take that moment to dump it's tears of joy onto us as well.

Most people just laughed it off and stood under the rain with happiness on their faces, not caring that their clothes were being soaked through and through. Some ran to their cars. Others ducked under their jackets or a friend's, but still laughed. Thing is, absolutely _nobody_ went back into the school.

I just stared at the scene in front of me, awestruck. I looked at Yao to see him already looking at me,a smiled plastered on his face. This time, instead of blushing and looking away, I smiled back and hugged him, lifting him up in the air. I didn't care if other people saw it. I didn't care. It was over. I didn't care about them anymore. They're opinions don't matter. I realized that, as I picked Yao up and spun him around. Fuck them. I'm happy.

Yao laughed and held onto me. Eventually, I put him down and by then we were already soaked. Yao looked at his clothes and shrugged. He grabbed my wrist and yelled over the screams of joy, "C'mon, I still wanna show you that place!" I nodded, still smiling, and let him lead the way.

He lead me to his car, a small Volkswagon beetle of the colour red, of course. He unlocked the doors and we jumped in.

Yao sat back for a minute and closed his eyes, smiling. "That was fun." I nodded and hummed. He opened his eyes and glanced at me. "Well then. Let's go." I nodded and Yao started the car and drove out of the school lot.

~Driving~

"We'll be driving for a while, just so you know." Yao said softly.

I nodded and turned to look out the window.

We were driving on a long and busy highway. The sun wasn't quite setting yet, but the sky was still a thing to look at. The clouds around the sun were tinged with reds, oranges and yellows that all blended into one beautiful sight.

I gazed at it through the windshield, then glanced at Yao, whose gaze was also focused out the windshield, but mostly on the road. Instantaneously, I saw a perfect picture.

Yes, I was an artist with drawing, but I knew a good picture when I saw one. I slipped out my phone and quickly snapped the photo.

Unfortunately, my sound had not been off, and it made a fake _snap_ and Yao turned his head in my direction and said, "Did you just take a picture of me?"

I looked away and put my phone back into my pocket. Yao laughed and said, "It doesn't matter, I just wanted to know."

I nodded my head shyly and showed him the picture. He only glanced at it, since he was driving, but I could tell he was surprised.

"Wow. You continue to impress me with your skills, Ivan." My face turned red, and I looked back out my window. I tried to make small talk.

"Where are we going?" I asked quietly. Yao smiled a bit.

"You'll see. It's cool. I've gone there since I was in the fourth grade. I think you'll like it"

I sighed and nodded. I wasn't getting anything else out of him.

"How's your sisters doing?" Yao said abruptly.

I looked at him and blinked. "They're doing well. Yekaterina is eating a lot better. And Natalia is doing well in school. I think she's started to make friends, even." Yao's eyebrows shot up.

"Wow. That's so good. I'm happy for you guys." He smiled and continued driving on the seemingly never-ending road.

I tried to get a gist of where we were going. We were just now entering a city next to our small town. It had taller buildings, more residents, and wider, busier roads. Yao came here when he was younger?

"Yao, how did you get here as a child? I don't think a child is allowed to walk this far." Yao laughed and nodded.

"You're right. My mom used to give me a ride here. Every year. Until now." Yao's gaze seemed to go somewhere else, probably resurfacing memories. His smile completely faded and he sighed. I immediately felt guilty. "Oh, I'm sorry I didn't-"

"Shut up. You don't need to apologize. It doesn't matter. You didn't know." Yao interrupted.

I nodded and looked down. I heard Yao let out a small laugh and I looked at him, eyebrows raised.

He looked at me and smiled and shook his head. "Nothing."

I pouted a bit, but looked back out the window.

America always was so strange. Why have such large cars if you're the only one's in them? And you continue to complain about that fast food joint...what was it? McDonald's? Yeah. If you don't like it so much, stop eating it. And EVERYTHING is sweet. Even the tea. Who sweetens tea _that_ much? I shook my head. Crazy.

Suddenly, Yao turned onto an an exit.

"We're close." Was all he said.

He took several turns when eventually we went over a small bridge. It was a brick bridge, something I didn't know were around anymore. Yao turned to the right as soon as we crossed the bridge, onto a small gravel patch. He put the car in park and turned off the car and looked at me, a smile on his face.

"Here."

I got out of the car and looked around. Right in front of the car was a small path that couldn't have been seen from the road down to the creek below the bridge.

Yao grabbed my bicep and said, "C'mon, it's down this way," and led me down the thin path.

There were twists, turns, spots not to step on and branches to watch out for, all of which Yao warned me of. Once we finally got down the rather steep path, my breath was taken away. Yao was right. This place _is_ amazing.

**AN: HAHAHA FUCKERS CLIFFYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY I'm just kidding I love you guys please don't kill me. Okay so my idea is to do a fanfiction based on a dubstep of "Sail" by AWOLNATION. It doesn't tell the story in the song itself, but I'd made one up and now I wanna use it in a fic. I want to do it with Bleach (omfg I love Bleach) but if you guys really want me to, I'll do it on a different anime. Check out my page for the one's that I've seen and please PM me, or review if that's allowed. I mean, like review nonetheless bc I need criticism. It makes me get better. And SERIOUSLY _PLEASE _PM me for things that I should do or someone fucking tell me if that's even allowed. Idk. Oh, and PLEASE tell me I'm not the only one who's seen _Perks Of Being A Wallflower. _Well now that I've made this longer than necessary, review, follow/favourite, PM, and happiness! **

**~mmbazb**

**Translations: ****Svyatoye der'mo: Holy shit  
**


	8. Carving Into Memories

**Again, like, wtf? Is my story just sucking ass just as much as I thought or is nobody reading this like at all? Are you hiding from me? Thank you RussianChinaDoll for your review. You were like the only one. I feel like the spawn of Canada and Prussia sometimes. Like, I am fucking AWESOME but fucking NO ONE notices me. Like, seriously. ANYONE can leave a review. Sorry for being on hiatus for so long. My grandmother is visiting and I'm a roady (is that even how you spell it?) for my town's high school band, which my sister attends. So, I've been like super busy. Ugh, I feel like I should just rewrite this story. I keep pushing things too quickly. Give me your feedback on this. Or not. Whatever the fuck you wanna do. On with the story. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia now shut the fuck up and read this terrible story**

"Here it is." Yao said.

Right in front of me was a crystal clear creek of water. Water that flowed so smoothly over rock, you could just faintly hear the trickle of water. Frogs croaked and crickets chirped, practically making music all around us. The cattails that jutted out from the bank swayed in the wind, and leaves from surrounding trees fluttered into the water. My artistic pulse immediately went wild, and I itched to draw the scene around me.

Yao broke the silence. "So... What do you think?"

I glanced over at him, having completely forgotten of his presence.

"It's just... Wow..." I whispered, still mesmerized by everything around me.

I heard Yao giggle and I looked at him again. He just smiled at me. "This is where my mom used to take me. She and I found this place when we were exploring the around us. Did I ever tell you that my mom used to paint too?"

I tilted my head to one side. "No, you didn't."

He smiled and grabbed my wrist. "C'mon, let's sit over here." He lead me to a cluster of rocks. There, there was a certain rock that seemed suitable for two people to sit on, and that's where Yao took me to sit on. Once we were situated, Yao crossed his legs and began talking again.

"My mom used to paint, yes. I never acquired the skill, mostly because as soon as I was interested, she got sick." I saw his eyes glaze over. "I kind of feel bad for not speaking up sooner." He said regretfully.

I shook my head. "I'm sure she didn't mind, since you were happy anyways." The corner of his mouth turned up a bit and he nodded. "I suppose you're right. Anyway, she liked to paint a lot. The paintings she created were mostly based off of traditional paintings of the Chinese culture. She liked to stick to tradition. I admired that about her." He smiled, probably uncovering happy memories of his mother. He shook his head and continued. "She put her heart and soul into her paintings, and they would always turn out absolutely breath taking. I wish I could draw like her. Kiku can draw, but he's more of a modernized drawer. Like, digital, you know?"

I nodded in understanding. _I think he's into some Japanese thing... Anime, right? _Yao continued. "She taught him, since he showed interest immediately." The corners of his mouth turned down. "Though I'm not sure his drawings are as innocent as they started out as." I smiled. I figured he was like that. The shy person with the strangest obsessions. But Yao was the older brother. Of course he was concerned. Yao sighed. "Let's talk about something else." I nodded and wiped my smile from my face, trying to hide my thoughts. "I could teach you how to draw, Yao." I said out of the blue.

_Wait, where the fuck did that come from? Oh well. _

Yao's eyes lit up and he looked at me hopefully. "Really? You'd do that?"

I nodded. "Of course. I don't know how good of a teacher I'd be though."

Yao shrugged. "You'll get better. I can't wait to start. When are you free?"

I scratched the back of my neck. "Uh, I don't know? Why don't you pick? I'm bad at stuff like this."

Yao ran his fingers through his hair as he thought of some sort of plan. Suddenly, his eyes brightened and he looked at me. "How about you meet me at the coffee shop on Sunday at noon? You can bring the art supplies and we can eat there too. Does that sound good?"

I nodded my head. It was summer. I probably wouldn't have a life except for when I'm around Yao.

He smiled brightly and said, "Then it's a date." My eyes widened and Yao laughed and quickly explained, "Not literally, chill." I laughed nervously and nodded.

Yao gazed out in front of him, staring at the creek. I followed his gaze to a rock that seemed to have inscriptions on it.

I glanced at Yao. "Hey, do you know what's on those rocks?" I asked curiously. He didn't say anything, he just stood up and followed a path of rocks that were just barely sticking out of the water. The rocks looked rather slick, due to the water that had been spraying lightly on it. I stood up as well and started to follow Yao. I looked at the small man, expecting to see him struggle, only to see him jump gracefully from rock to rock. His movements were swift, fluid, yet grounded, all at the same time. It was rather mesmerizing. The whole scene was, actually. The creek, the sounds of the creatures around us, and the soft padding of Yao's feet.

I shook my head and focused on getting across the creek's rocks without falling into the clear water. I slowly put one foot on a rock, testing it. It didn't make my foot slip from under me, so I put more weight onto it until all of my body weight was on it. Surprisingly, it wasn't as slippery as it looked. It was slippery, yes, but not too bad if you were careful. This place was creepy... I stepped onto another rock, and it supported my weight as well.

I'd made it over to the last rock when I actually slipped. I let out a gasp, but I felt a small hand wrap around my wrist and pull me before I could fall into the cold water below me. I looked up to see Yao, worry laced in his face. "You okay?" He asked me. I swallowed and nodded, not really able to talk yet. He let out a breath of relief and pointed at the rock that we'd been after. "This is my memories of previous years."

He sat on another rock nearby and motioned for me to sit next to him. It was starting to get pretty dark, so I had to squint to see what was carved into the rock. Names, names everywhere. It was Yao's and what I assumed was his mother's. They were not only in English, but in Chinese as well. It looked like some were half English and half Chinese. Some of them were just English or just Chinese. But they all had one thing in common. They all meant the same things. I looked at him. "Is that your mother's name, Yao?" He smiled a bit, still looking at the carvings and nodded.

"We did this every year. And actually," He pulled out a nail thing and a small hammer from his backpack, which we were still lugging around, despite that school was over, and handed it to me. "I was gonna do it with you this year." My eyes widened and I looked between the tools and Yao.

"A-are you sure, Yao? I mean, this has been your tradition..." He smiled and nodded.

"Yeah, since you were the only one that stuck around, I figured you were special. I'll show you how to do it, here." He grabbed the nail and put it against the rock, and held the hammer right above it. He said, "You get one chance at it, so you have to be very..." He tapped the nail into the rock with the hammer, though enough to chip a bit off. "Careful." I nodded and watched closely as he began to chip more and more, forming a Chinese symbol that was the same as the others already engraved in the rock. "There." He said as soon as he was done. I looked at it. It was a lot neater than the previous ones, since he's grown since then.

"Okay, so you have to hit it softly, but just enough to chip it off. And don't hold the hammer too high above, you might hit it too hard." I nodded and complied to his directions. Yao watched as I began to carve a line down, then back up to the right, and down again. It would be considered a backwards "N" for English speakers. Then I carved another line straight down, but put two half ovals to the right, into a "small capital B", then a circle with a line to the right. Finally, I carved two lines, straight down, and a line horizontally, connecting them both. In the end it looked like NBaH, almost.

Yao tilted his head. "What does than mean?" I smiled.

"It's 'Ivan' in Russian lettering. I hope you don't mind." Yao shook his head.

"No, no of course not. I love it."

I smiled and scratched the back of my neck sheepishly.

"Well now that were done with that." Yao said, laid back on the rock, looking at the now starry sky. I leaned back as well, right next to him. The city was a ways away from where we were, so you could see the night's sky quite easily. Yao pointed out constellations to me, gave their name, backgrounds, and even some's solar system, since stars were suns anyway. I closed my eyes and listened to Yao's smooth voice. I didn't tune out the words the honey-smooth voice was forming, since I was quite interested in space, but I focused on how calming his voice was. I looked over at Yao, his eyes full of admiration and curiosity. He caught me looking at him and stopped talking.

"Yes?" He said.

I couldn't think of anything to say so I just leaned in closer... and closer...

"Hey! What are you kids doing down there?"  
A voice made Yao and myself jump and look at the source. Up at the bank was a police officer, pointing a bright flashlight at us. I jumped up and squinted to see past the light. "I'm sorry sir we-"

"Yao? Oh it's you! I didn't recognize you with... who is this?" The police officer interrupted my frantic apologies.

Yao chuckled from behind me. "Hey Andrew. This is Ivan. He's a friend from school." He gestured towards me.

The officer -Andrew?- raised an eyebrow. "Ivan, hmm? Well, Ivan, I'll tell you this once. If you hurt Yao, I swear to God-"

"Oh, shut up 'Drew I can handle myself just fine."

Andrew frowned but nodded. "Where's your mother? I thought you only came here with her?"

Yao's smile instantly faded and was replaced with a grim face. "She died just recently. The cancer got her."

Andrew lowered his head. "I'm very sorry Yao. You'll be in my prayers."

Yao nodded. "Thank you."

I shifted awkwardly. "Umm..."

Yao finished the conversation between the overprotective friend. "Well I'll see you later, Andrew. Thanks for 'stopping by'" He put airquotes over it.

Andrew chuckled and nodded. "See ya. Be safe." He winked and headed back up the hill.

Yao huffed, visibly annoyed by his last comment. "Stupid asshole..." He muttered under his breath.

I smiled and looked at him. "You get offended so easily, Yao. And I thought you didn't like Christians. He said he'll keep you in his prayers. That means he's Christian, right?"

Yao smiled. "Yeah, he's Christian. But he's an exception. He doesn't hate LGBTs. He's Episcopalian. They're a bit more laid back, and they accept people more than the average Christian. They have an entire community, actually. PFLAG. Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians And Gays. His family is pretty cool." I stared in awe. _There was actually a community of gays? I have to look that up. _

Yao giggled at my amazement. "You should do some research. You'd be surprised." I nodded, still a bit dazed.

"C'mon," Yao said, and I looked in his direction. "Let's go. I'm getting kinda cold."

I nodded and watched him again as he gracefully jumped from rock to rock, not slipping up at all. Eventually, I followed and took my steps very carefully. Right foot, then left next to it. Right, then left. When I finally got to the last rock, a small hand was outstretched towards me. I looked up carefully and saw that it was attached to the small Chinese man. I smiled and took the hand.

"Thanks." I muttered.

Yao hummed a welcome and started back up the slim path towards the car. I followed him and heeded the places Yao warned me about before. Once we got up to the car, I walked to the driver's side and opened the door, a goofy grin on my face.

Yao giggled. "Such a gentleman." He said, and slid into the car.

I smiled and walked around the front of the car and got into the passenger's seat. I pulled the seatbelt over my chest and clicked it into the small button next to me. I laid my head back on the headrest as Yao drove out of the dirt road and onto the road, over the bridge. I found myself falling asleep, and eventually did.

**HOLY SHIT THAT TOOK FUCKING FOREVER TO WRITE. I'm sorry school started two days ago and I really haven't had a chance to use the computer. But OMG I GOT TO SEE MY GIRLFRIEND. (We aren't supposed to be dating bc we got in trouble so I couldn't text her or see her all fucking summer so I'm like so fucking happy. And I didn't get in trouble bc I was dating a girl, it was because of different personal reasons) I'm not gonna brag, but I am, bc she's so beautiful and I love her and I need to shut my fucking face and get on w this shit sorry. PFLAG: IT'S A REAL THING GO LOOK IT UP, YOU'RE NOT ALONE BABIES. I'm cereal that thing is amazing google it. Also, I am an Episcopalian. So yeah. That's what it's like check it out breh. And sorry if the last part seemed rushed: it was. Uhhhh if anyone has questions, PM me. I think that's it. Thanks so much for reading and happiness~!**

**~mmbzb**

**Oh one more important thing: If there is any insecure LGBT(Q) person (or any person!) you can always throw me a message kittens. I like to make people feel better, and I like talking to people! You guys are all beautiful, thanks.**


	9. Ember's Flames

**Yayyyyyy ! I be back! Shit, that took forever. I'm sorry I'm not updating as much, I'm trying! I've got school and extra activities, and I'm also still getting over my breakup w my ex. I've gotten with another girl but... eh fuck it. Anyway, thank you soooooooo much stefannotstefan for your review! I will try to get to it in this chapter, if not the next. Also thanks to all who followed/favourited.:3 Much appreciated. On with the story! Here is chapter six!**

**Btw, should I do a Septiplier fic?**

I glanced at Ivan about ten minutes after we left the creek, and saw that he was asleep. He was so cute when he sleeps.

_Not that he isn't cute when he is awake..._

I snapped the thoughts from my mind and tried to focus more on the road. But I still glanced at his slacken face, his lips partially opened. His breaths came out in rhythmic, slow puffs.

I wanted so badly to reach out and touch his perfectly sculpted face, soft, yet sharp cheekbones... But I restrained myself, focusing my eyes back on the road.

The soft streetlights illuminated the roads with lights similar to the painting Ivan created. _For me. _I smiled at that thought and looked at his sleeping body once more. The body that moved so clumsily, but sturdily across the creek rocks to where I had been. He was very strong, yes _very_ strong, but not so much graceful. That was my good quirk. I was always very fluid and graceful, especially for a man, but I never really appreciated it. I had felt the eyes of Ivan on my back when I was jumping across the rocks, but it probably hadn't been for amazement or anything.

Suddenly, I saw a figure dart out into the dark street, and I slammed on the brakes and Ivan shook awake, yelling some Russian curse. I rolled down my window and poked my head out, trying to make out what I almost hit.

"What, what is it ?" Ivan said, a bit panicky.

"Hello?" I yelled out the window, ignoring Ivan.

"S-so sorry ! I didn't see you..." A feminine sounding voice said from the other side of the car.

I jumped out and walked around to where I heard the voice. Standing on the side of the road was a raggedy teen holding a small bundle.

"Y-your car is very quiet... I was just trying to cross..." She said quietly as a car passed by.

"No, no it's okay miss. What's the bundle?" She smiled a bit, her short, curly, brown hair shifting as she looked down at said bundle. "My son." Was all she said.

"Oh dear! Why are you out so late with a baby? Is something wrong?" I asked worriedly.

She sighed sadly. "My parents threw me out. I've been homeless for about five months now."

I gasped. "Goodness! Is there anything I can help with miss?"

"Yao?" I heard Ivan's voice from behind me. I glanced behind me, where a sleepy Ivan was towering over me.

"Ivan, this is a runaway mother. We- we need to do something-"

"No, you don't need to do anything. It's my fault it's like this."

"No, I insist-"

"Does your baby need a thicker blanket ?" Ivan asked randomly.

The girl's eyes lit up. "Oh yes, please. He's been so cold..."

Ivan unraveled his long, white scarf from his neck. "Here. My mother made it for me back in Russia. It should definitely suit your needs."

"Oh, goodness, but that seems so-"

"Please." Ivan interrupted. "It's the least I can do."

The girl's eyes watered and she accepted the scarf with shaking hands. "Thank you. So much. I am in your debt. Could I have your names, ma'am, sir?"

Yao giggled. "I'm male. And my name is Yao, Yao Wang, as he mentioned earlier." I gestured towards Ivan.

He nodded and said, "Ivan Braginaski. Pleasure to help you."

The teen mother suddenly hugged us both, still clutching the small bundle in the right arm.

"Thank you so much..." She sobbed.

I reached into my pocket, pulling away from the girl, and pulled out my wallet I handed her five twenties, which is the most I could suffice with my budget. "I wish I could give more but... Get some food. And clothes."

The girl took the money with still shaking hands. "I will never forget you." She whispered. "Either of you."

We embraced her once more, before I asked, "Can we see your son? I'm sure he's beautiful."

She nodded and unraveled Ivan's scarf. A fragile head of a baby came into view, one with a small tuft of brown hair on top. "His name is Jett."

"Beautiful..." I heard Ivan murmur, and I smiled.

"And your name, miss?"

"Oh! My name is Ember. Ember Smoke. And thank you again."

I nodded. "Of course. Is there anything else we can help with...?"

"No, thank you. I have to be on my way. I won't forget you two. I promise." Ember said.

"Goodbye. Best of luck to you." I waved at the teen mother as she dashed across the street, this time, no cars had been coming.

~xoxo~ Later ~xoxo~

"Ivan, we're almost home." Yao said to me, as I was now very awake.

"Can I stay at your place? My sisters are all probably asleep and my father will be pissed beyond recognition anyway and I don't want to deal with it right now. Please?" I asked, trying not to sound desperate, though I was.

Yao smiled a bit and nodded. "I understand. Though you're definitely not going to fit in any of my clothes, no offense."

I laughed. "I know. I usually just sleep in boxers anyway." I immediately blushed, realizing what I just said. "I-if that's okay, umm..."

It was Yao's turn to laugh. "Fine by me. You want to sleep on the couch or my bed? I can sleep on the couch, if you want."

I bit my lip. Of fucking course I want to sleep with Yao. But he will never want to sleep with me. Couch it is.

Before I could say my answer, Yao muttered, "Or you can sleep with me... Whatever you want..."

I blushed and bit my lip more. Holy shit, was that for real? Or did I just dream that?

"I-I don't know..." I said quietly. "It's whatever you want..."

"Then sleep with me. No point in wasting sheets."

I swallowed and nodded. Holy. Shit. This is happening. My mind immediately wondered, as I fantasized what could happen on that red bed...

I snapped out of my thoughts and focused on the surroundings of the car. We were almost at his apartment.

Fuck, this is either gonna be a really good night, or a really awkward one.

**Okay, I tried to fit as much of the story into this chapter as possible so you had a lot to read while it takes me fucking years to update. And sorry if you don't like that I made Ivan give his scarf away, I just thought it would be a nice jumpstart to get him to show Yao his scars. If you like the longer chapters, plz tell me and I'll continue to make them long. Please please please review, favourite and follow! Thank you for reading and happiness~!**

**~mmbazb**

**Again, Septiplier fic?**


	10. I Love You

**Hi everyone! I'm here! I'm trying really hard to update a little more frequently, but it's a bit hard. But I will try! I'm writing a Septiplier fanfiction on paper, but I don't know if I'll upload it or even type it up. If you guys want me to, anyone can leave a review, and I'll do it but anyways! Please enjoy!**

I was enveloped in that same warm red when I walked into Yao's apartment. The red colours had become more of a comforting sight now. That's why I smiled as I looked around, spotting a few things that had been moved around since my last time here.

"Want something to drink?" Yao asked from the other side of the room, where he was depositing his keys on a dark brown table.

I bit my lip nervously and shrugged. "Um, yeah. That sounds good."

Yao smiled at me and turned to the kitchen to walk to the cabinets, searching for something. "You want hot chocolate?" He asked, not turning around.

I entered the kitchen, walking up behind him, and said, "Yeah."

He jumped back into me, obviously having not heard me approach him. "Fuck, I didn't even hear you come in."

I blushed and walked backwards to give him space. "S-sorry." I said quietly.

Yao sighed. "It's fine. Don't apologize. Come here." He opened his arms, allowing me to hug him.

Wait, hug him?

I wasn't going to have a problem with it, I just didn't think...

I walked up to him and wrapped my arms around his small body, taking in his immense warmth before he could think that I was hesitating.

He slipped his arms around my waist, which was almost level to his chest. I felt his heartbeat against mine, and they were both at high rates. I liked the way his slender arms felt around my body, and I held him tighter before he could think about letting go.

I breathed in the scent of him, just taking all of him in shamelessly. He was mine right now. We were alone. I could speak freely and not be in fear that someone would judge me. Because Yao never judges me, no matter what I do. He just tells me to be me, and that was it. I loved that so much about him. And I just didn't want to let that go just yet.

"Ivan..." Yao murmured into my chest.

I didn't back up. "Yeah?"

"Were you hiding something on your neck with that scarf?"

I tensed. "U-um... Well..."

Yao rubbed circles on my back. "You can tell me. We're alone."

I sighed and pulled back. "Start making the hot chocolate. It's a long story."

~xoxo~ Later ~xoxo~

Yao handed me a grey coloured mug, full of the sweet liquid I knew would feel amazing on my taste buds. He sat down next to me on his red couch and pulled his knees up to his chest, looking at me intently.

I took a deep breath, searching for a place to start.

"I guess you could say everything went to hell back when I was still in Russia..."

~xoxo~

"_S-she's dead?" I whimpered. _

"_I'm sorry Ivan. We did everything there was, but she was just too sick."_

_My older sister was trying to comfort my little sister and I; our mother had just died. Tuberculosis._

"_I loved her too Ivan. I know..." She whispered. _

_I hugged Kat, sobbing into her shirt. She was gone, gone..._

"_We're moving to America." She whispered into my ear. _

_I had barely listened to it, but it was true. It was the only way. Father would get a new job and we'd be okay. Sort of. That was the plan, but that didn't happen. Father ended up not being able to get over our mom's death, even after purchasing tickets and flying to America and getting a place to stay and enrolling in schools and seeing the brighter side of it all, our father had to screw us over. He quit his job, leaving us to find money for his alcohol and the roof over our heads and the food on the table. And things only got worse from there for me. _

_School has definitely been the worst for me. I've realized my sexuality upon coming to America, when some girls had asked me out and it just kind of dawned upon me that I didn't like girls. I just don't. And everyone thought I was messed up, strange, and too weird to fit in. Plus all the damn Christians hate me because it's a fucking sin too. Life sucked. _

_I'm always told how ugly I am now that everyone found out. Before, I was 'so sexy' and all the girls lusted for me. But now I am ugly and terrible for "choosing this lifestyle". It hurts. So much. And all of it is probably true. _

"So... I..." I trailed off. I really didn't want to tell Yao this part. It's terrible...

"You what, Ivan?" He asked softly.

I bit my lip and choked back a sob.

"I started cutting myself." I blurted and burst into tears. Yao reached over and hugged me tightly, murmuring calming words into my ear.

"Ivan, it's okay, it's okay..." He whispered, his honey voice rolling off his tongue.

"No, it's not and I'm sorry I'm sorry Yao. I'm a sad excuse of a person and I don't even deserve your sympathy." I sobbed, losing all control.

Yao pulled back. "Look at me."

I refused, continuing to weep and choke back tears.

Yao's voice was more firm this time. "Look at me."

I glanced up, biting my lip and shaking violently.

"You need to quit thinking those things. None of them are true. You deserve a lot, Ivan, and my sympathy is definitely one of them. You're a great person, I can tell you that. An amazing artist. And a great friend. You're my best friend, Ivan. How could you think any of that shit is true? That's like the total opposite of you. I think you're rather handsome, personally." Yao said to me, spilling his emotions over his words.

"Because that's what everyone says to me. I'm always being called ugly and stupid and weird by everyone, so it has to be true." I said hoarsely. My throat was sore from crying.

Yao's eyes softened. "Ivan, your value doesn't decrease based on someone's inability to see your worth. You're so important to me... Can't you see that?" I saw water start to pool in Yao's eyes.

Oh my god.

Oh my _god_.

I've been so clouded by my dark thoughts that... that I didn't even see it...

Tears spilled over Yao's face and, somehow, he smiled. Smiled. "I'm sorry I shouldn't be getting emotional here..."

I shook my head. "No... Just... I'm sorry. I didn't realize..."

Yao smiled again. "It's okay. Don't worry about it."

I shook my head again. "No, here. You deserve to see. I should have shown you sooner..."

He opened his mouth to say something, but shut it as I grabbed the bottom of my shirt. I lifted it above my head and discarded the shirt next to me. I was met with a chilly air conditioner breeze as I sat on the couch, bare chested in front of Yao.

I was sure my face was bright red, as well as my neck, as Yao looked at my carved scars. His eyes widened, probably at the sight of so many, as his eyes danced along my bare chest.

"Ivan..." He whispered.

"Y-yeah?"

"I love you."

**Sorry. Had to. I wrote this in one night, you guys should be proud. I'll try to update this soon, I know it's a cliffy. Sorry if this seems all over the place, my head hurts and I'm tired. My little sister was also constantly bothering me while I was writing this. Anyway, thanks to everyone who has reviewed, favourited or followed, they keep me going. Happiness~!**

**~mmbazb**


	11. Body Carvings

**Take four. God damn. I have tried to write this four times and I'm trying one more time. I really hope this one turns out okay. Please enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia nor the show mentioned. **

"Y-you... you what?" Ivan asked, slightly flustered.

My eyes widened. _Shit... Think of something... Cover it up..._

"S-sorry! I didn't mean it in... _that_ way. I just thought... you know, it might cheer you up!" I said, laughing nervously.

Ivan just shook his head, shrugging a bit. "Okay then."

I bit my lip and scratched the back of my neck. _Ah shit, way to make it awkward doofus._

"S-so... when did this start?" I asked, trying to change the subject.

Ivan tilted his head, looking away and thinking about it. "Hm... it was about a month or two after I got here so... five months ago?" I chewed on my lip more. This has been going on for five months and nobody has noticed? "And you're the only one who knows besides me. So please don't tell anyone. I can't let my sisters know." Ivan said quietly.

I shook my head. "Of course not. I won't tell a soul. But I'm glad you told me."

Ivan cracked a grim smile. Instead of trying to talk to him more, I just reached out and brushed my fingers over his carved upper body. I thought I felt his muscles tighten the second I touched him, but I dismissed it and touched a scar that ran over his shoulder. It seemed older than the rest of them, and I questioned Ivan about it.

He smiled widely and said, "That's because it was there long before I arrived in America. Someone tried to attack me in a remote street in Russia, probably when I was about 12, and cut me there, as a threat. He demanded me for money, which I had none of. Literally. We had nothing at that point and it was pointless robbing us. When I told the man that, he searched all my pockets and... forbidden places... but didn't find anything. Like I said. He then huffed and left me alone. It was a strange experience."

My eyebrows pulled together in concern, and Ivan noticed and quickly dismissed it by saying, "Don't worry, I'm fine. It wasn't that bad a cut. Plus it was forever ago."

I nodded hesitantly and continued to run my fingers over him. I wasn't sure what it was, but it was calming just to touch him. It felt nice.

I located one long scar that ran from the top of his shoulder all the way to nearly behind his ear. I held my tongue for this one, not really wanting to know the reason behind it.

I heard him gasp as I touched on that ran along his collar bone, and retracted my hand. "S-sorry." I mumbled.

He shook his head. "It's fine. That one's just a little sensitive."

I nodded, but kept my hands to myself this time. I didn't want to make him uncomfortable.

"Is your hot chocolate cold?" I asked Ivan.

He grabbed his cup and took a sip. "Yeah." He said, grimacing at the taste of cold hot chocolate. I smiled at him and took the cup from his hand. "I'll go heat it up in the microwave. Is there anything else you'd like?" He shook his head and I nodded and headed towards the kitchen. He followed me in as I popped open the microwave and slid the cup in. I put the time for one minute, assuming it was pretty chilled by now. I hit "start" and turned around to find a shirtless Ivan leaning against the table, observing me.

"Hi." I called out. He blinked and nodded at me. "You do realize you're still not wearing a shirt... right?" I questioned him. His eyes widened and he rushed out of the room to find his discarded shirt. I had to admit, I was pretty upset that he didn't leave it off.

When he came back in, he was still sliding the shirt over his head. I giggled at him, but turned to get the mug from the microwave as I heard it beep. I grabbed a potholder and clutched the handle of the steaming mug carefully. I set it on the counter and deemed it too hot to drink, and explained this to Ivan. He agreed and I decided we should do something in the meantime.

"I could teach you some drawing basics, if you want..." Ivan mumbled.

I quickly nodded, excited at the idea of learning how to draw.

Ivan smiled at me and said, "Go find some paper, lots of it, and two pencils. And make sure the erasers work good."

~Later~

"How can you remember all this shit from the top of your head?" I asked Ivan, bewildered by the amount of information coming out of him from a subject as simple as sketching.

"Well, first, sketching is very important, so there's going to be a hell of a lot of information about it and second, I've been drawing since I was a child, of course I know a lot about this." Ivan giggled at my expression. "Sorry. But you're improving. See, you made the circle better." He pointed to a more ovular circle and I glared at him.

His smile dropped and he brushed the tip of his pencil over the paper to make the circle a little more circular and erased the wrong lines.

I sighed and took part in fixing my outline. "Sorry." I mumbled. Ivan smiled and shrugged, continuing to help me make the picture clearer.

...

...

...

"I didn't know you could do that..." Yao murmured, fascinated with my techniques for drawing.

"Yeah, you can just push it down harder and you can make it darker, instead of finding another pencil. But it only works for certain pencils, okay?" I said, trying to make sure he didn't accidentally mess up a future picture because of my misinformation.

Yao nodded and added shading to the neck of the character he drew with me. His hand was a little unstable, but that was normal for beginners and it would go away after a while. The character he was currently shading was me. He insisted he drew me, since I'd already done one of him. I couldn't deny.

I helped him with the different shades of my pale gray hair and the creamy white colour of my now gone scarf. When we were finally finished, I leaned back and took in what we just accomplished. The lines were a little wobbly, since I insisted Yao do them, and the colours would sometimes leak out of the lines, but overall, it looked pretty good.

"Wow, nice job Yao. It looks amazing." I said, glancing towards a proud looking Yao.

He said to me, "Well you did most of it..."

I shook my head. "No I didn't. I guided you through most of it, but you did all of it."

Yao smiled at that and nodded. I smiled back and checked my phone to look at the time. It was nearly midnight. Yao didn't seem to care.

"Hey, let's watch something on Netflix!" He said excitedly.

I shrugged and he grabbed the remote from the coffee table to turn the TV on and switch it to Netflix. We argued for about ten minutes until we finally agreed on a show called _Cosmos_. It was basically about the universe, and we were both pretty interested in it. As it started, the amount of information flowing into my ears was a bit overwhelming, but as I adjusted, it just fascinated me, the amount of space in the universe.

We were silent the whole time, not in an awkward sense, but in a sort of fascination of everything we were learning. I soon felt myself drifting off, barely hearing what the man on the screen was saying, and before I knew it, sleep had taken over my senses.

...

...

...

Ivan was asleep. It was the second time I got to see him asleep today. I loved watching his peaceful slumber, and even fell asleep next to him, the show boring compared to Ivan's sleeping form. My head resting on his bulky shoulder and my feet curled up under me on the couch, we slept until I woke up first. I slowly gathered my senses and sat up, rubbing my eyes. I glanced at the still-sleeping Ivan and smiled. We hadn't had a chance to set up anything to sleep on, so we were still in our clothes from yesterday and his shoes were even on. I pushed down the urge to touch his silky looking hair and stood up, bending backwards to pop my back. He stirred a little, and I tensed, but he let out a sigh and went back to his sleeping.

I went towards the kitchen and flicked on the lights. Everything was still the same, but the damn hot chocolate was still on the counter. I laughed to myself. We had forgotten it over the events of drawing and Netflix. I dumped out the contents and put the mug in the sink. Walking over to the fridge, I went over the items in it to see what I could make for breakfast. I wanted to make something good for Ivan, but I wasn't sure what he liked.

After about thirty minutes of contemplating of what I should make, I decided to just go get some donuts. I left a note on the coffee table explaining where I was going, in case he woke up, and left the house.

~Later~

_Ding!_

The soft tinkle of a bell above my head sounded and a woman at the front counter looked over towards me.

"Hello! Welcome to Little Dots! How can I help you?" She chirped from behind the counter.

I smiled brightly at her and said, "Good morning. Can I have a to-go case of six donuts? The variety pack please."

She nodded and typed my order up on the computer and headed to the back of the store to presumably grab my order. As I waited, I looked around the shop. It was the same shop that I had asked Ivan to meet me at, when I learned that my mother had died. There was the same paintings, same colours, and the same girl that had taken our orders.

I smiled. I hadn't missed her gossiping about us that day, when I was clinging to Ivan like his lover.

My face turned red. I did look like his lover. Was that how I always acted? Do I treat him like I would a... boyfriend?

I thought about it. Ivan was currently the most important person in my life. I don't really like anyone right now but him, and...

Oh shit I _do_ love him.

**Yeah, yeah I know I ended both on a similar note. But holy shit I am so sorry this has taken me so fucking long to write. I've had a writers block this entire time and it hasn't been easy. This chapter sucks ass, and I know it, but I'm attempting to get this shit along. Everyone is figuring out their feelings so hopefully everything will be okay in the next chapter. Anyway, thank you to all who has favourited, followed, or reviewed, they help me a lot. Hope you have a nice day and happiness!**

**~mmbazb**


	12. The Same Feelings?

**Okayyyy I'm back. I've been extremely busy with school and I'm sorry. :( My little sister is watching me write this. I am a terrible example. Anyway, on with the story. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia. **

When I finally woke, Yao was gone. I sat up and rubbed my eyes, trying to clear the blurriness. As I stretched my arms above my head, I noticed a small note on the coffee table. I leaned forward and grabbed it to get a better look at it.

_Ivan,_

_I'm going to the café to get some donuts. Didn't feel like making anything. I'll be back at around 10. Do whatever you like till then. See ya :)_

_-Yao_

I tilted my head to the side to pop it and then scratch the back of my neck. After checking my watch, I realized I really only had 15 minutes till Yao came back, so I got onto the couch, which I had failed to do last night,as I had been asleep on the floor all night. I curled up and and felt around for my scarf.

Oh. Right. I didn't have it. Thoughts of last night and everything that had been said came back up and I curled up tighter, embarrassment showing brightly on my cheeks.

For once, I was glad Yao wasn't here.

…

…

…

When I got back to the apartment, Ivan was curled up on the couch and looked like he was asleep again. I smiled and carried the box full of assorted donuts and walked over to the still form. I set the box on the coffee table, right where the note I made should have been and looked over Ivan. He had the note in one hand and was breathing softly.

He didn't really look the same as before, so I said, "Ivan, you're awake, aren't you?"

He peeked open an eye and smiled sheepishly. I laughed smiled back at him. "I have some donuts. I got the variety pack, so there should be at least _something_ in there that you like."

He nodded and sat up to stretch his arms. I opened the the box and grabbed a powdered one, then sat on the couch as he leaned forward to check what was inside.

"Whoa, I haven't even heard of half these flavours." Ivan reveled. After seemingly contemplating all the flavours, he finally settled for a regular chocolate.

Once he sat down, quietly munching on his donut, I bit my lip and decided it was time. "So um... Ivan... I... Have something to ask..."

Ivan looked over, his cheeks full of the sweet donut bread and hummed. I couldn't help but giggle at his face, which was the epitome of everything cute. But, instead of dwelling on the cuteness of his face, I decided to continue my asking.

"D-Do you um... How do I go about this... Do you... Like me?" My face was beet red by the time I finished, and as I looked at Ivan, his face appeared to be the same.

He scratched the back of his neck, saying, "You mean more than a friend, right?" I nodded, glad I didn't need to explain that prospect. Ivan took a deep breath and suddenly put his food down to cup my face. Looking into my eyes, he said, "Yes. I do. Actually, I have for a while. I'm guessing since you asked, you share the same feelings?" Once again, I nodded and Ivan smiled, bringing our foreheads together. I felt his soft metal locks brush against my forehead and smiled, feeling more relieved than I have ever been.

**AN: I don't know what else to write? I'm sorry I just... I'll write the next chapter in a second, just let me finish a chapter for my other story. I'm sorry this is so short. I feel terrible because you guys have been waiting so long... Anyway, Give me a few. Thank you, and happiness!**

**~mmbazb**


	13. Sensual

**AN: Okay next chapter. Writing this just after the previous. I will try to make it much longer for this one! Thank you!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or its characters.**

It's been three months. We've been dating for three months and it has been the happiest days of my entire life. I couldn't have a better boyfriend.

The only problem is that we still haven't told my father.

My father is a homophobic pig and he can't come around to accept anything that he hasn't been taught to accept. I've tried to talk Yao into waiting until we graduate, but he said he "can't wait that damn long, aru." So I'm going to tell him. Just... later.

But for now I have to get through my first day back to school as a sophmore, or second year. I was moderately afraid of what was to come, but I have new found confidence after Yao told me how things are. Alfred is just letting his anger out on me, and I shouldn't let him get to me because he's just doing it because he's jealous.

I tried to remember this as I walked into the large glass doors again, but everything seemed to slip my mind as the stares and glares and snickers were sent my way. Luckily, Yao was right there beside me, squeezing my hand when a jab was sent my way.

Finally, my worst fear was presented to me, in the middle of the hallway, right beside my new locker.

Alfred Jones.

A smirk smeared across his face and I let go of Yao's hand, walking ahead to stand right in front of him. I looked down at him, keeping my face expressionless. He crossed his arms, leaning his weight to one side and sneered, "Where's your scarfy-scarf, commie faggot?" A crowd began to form around the two of us, but I noticed Yao staying right behind me in my peripheral vision.

I smiled, trying to make the grin look as creepy as possible. "I sacrificed it to the demons I worship."

Alfred's face showed just the slightest expression of fear before it disappeared entirely, but I noticed it. "The fuck is wrong with you, faggot? Finally go crazy?" Snickers spread through the crowd with his weak insult before I spoke up.

"You know, I think the real question is what the fuck is wrong with _you_, Alfred."

Gasps erupted throughout the crowd, and Alfred's grin disappeared, replaced with a scowl as I continued. "Why the fuck would you make fun of a person because they're gay when _you're _gay yourself?" I said cheerfully, keeping a smile across my face.

For a split second, Alfred's face shifted to horror before he burst out laughing, and the crowd around us joined in.

"Hey, dumbass, quit blaming others for your own faggot problems." He said, a sneer across his face.

My smile grew larger as I noticed something. The gods must have blessed me, for on Alfred's neck was a large, dark purple hickey.

"Then how do you explain this?" I said, pointing to the dark spot. Alfred's eyes widened and he slapped a hand over his neck, trying to cover it. But he was too late, as everyone burst out laughing, and pointed at Alfred, and his expression turned to fear as he was found out. He darted through the crowd, pulling his hood over his head and ran out of the school.

I giggled and felt a hand fit into mine. I looked to my right and Yao was there, smiling up at me. I smiled back and leaned down to peck his forehead softly.

When I straightened to my normal height, I saw a dirty blonde head disappear behind the glass doors of the school before running out of sight. I realized it was Arthur, Alfred's "boyfriend," and made it a priority to talk to Alfred privately when I saw him again.

I was taken from my thoughts when the tardy bell rang and Yao and I rushed to shove some shit into our lockers before running to our first classes of the day.

…

…

…

It was the end of the day and I managed to survive my classes. Yao of course wasn't in any of them, but they were still pretty okay. I found Yao after school and we began our trek home.

"Wanna come to my house? My parents aren't home." Yao said with a wink.

I smiled and swung our connected hands between us. "Da, I would like that."

Yao smiled back and I felt a sense of completion. This was everything I could ever hope for. Everything was good. I wouldn't trade it for anything.

…

…

…

"What do you want to watch?" Yao asked from the livingroom. I thought about the options as a prepared a bag of popcorn to go into the microwave.

After thinking for a few seconds, I called out, "Uhhh I don't know. I think we've watched everything on Netflix, haha." Yao giggled from the doorway, which he was currently standing in. I glanced at him and sent a smile his way.

"So there's nothing to do?" He questioned, coming to stand by me. I nodded and popped the microwave open and put the packet of popcorn into it. Before I could shut it, I felt an arm wrap around my waist, and I looked over to see Yao leaning heavily against me. He looked up at me with a certain glint in his eye, and recognized it as that same look I saw all those months ago.

_Lust. _

I bent down to kiss him slowly, trying to savour the moment as best I could. His mouth moved against mine and I put my hands around his thin waist, pulling him closer to me. His hands traveled up to my neck, where he reached around to play with the hairs on the back of my neck. I held back a loud moan that nearly escaped from my throat, and instead lifted him up onto the counter, settling myself between his legs.

I felt his tongue press against my lips and I opened my mouth more, letting him scour my mouth with the appendage. His hands moved to my back, and under my shirt where he began to lift it. A blush made it's way across my cheeks as he did. It was rare when we went this far, and I always got embarrassed when he did.

I felt the shirt ride up my chest, and parted from Yao's lips to let him take it off entirely. Yao's eyes darted to the fading scars across my chest, and his hands moved to trace them up to my neck, where he dragged a finger to my lips. After tracing the outline of my lips, he retracted his hand and leaned forward to kiss me again. I rested one my arms on the counter on either side of him and put the other one on his thigh, squeezing it lightly. Yao groaned sensually and I almost passed out over how sexy it sounded.

Yao always said it was hard to "get me in the mood," but once I got in it, I was really sexy, apparently. I wish I had the confidence to tell him that I thought he sounded way sexier, but I kept it to myself for a little while longer, as I heard him moan again, but then he broke the kiss to breathe for a few seconds.

"Mm... That's always so nice..." He panted. I felt the tips of my ears go red, but kept silent. "Hey. Want to take it a step further?" Yao asked, rubbing circles into my hip. He always asked. It was really sweet and thoughtful. I nodded, not really sure what the next step was, but backed up when Yao motioned for me to. As Yao lead me to his bedroom, I started to get an idea of what the next "step" was, and felt both apprehension and exhilaration at the same time.

**AN: Yayyyy I got it done! I'm sorry I didn't get it done yesterday, I had to go to sleep. I hope you like this, I had fun writing it. Finally getting into the good stuff (; (; (; Alright, that's all I have, thank you for reading and happiness!**

**~mmbazb**


	14. Warning

**Hey, I'm really sorry that I haven't been updating these stories, but I've been really unsure about continuing these. I started these when I was actually rather young, so I don't particularly like how I started these. I don't know anyone's opinions either, so I'm giving everyone a chance to give their opinions now. Tell me if you like it, if I should continue these, or if they're actually just bad and I should either restart or stop altogether. This is the only warning I'm putting up and I'm encouraging everyone to please give me input. You can email me [ifoundmylazyhaflinger, gmail], message me privately here on Fanfiction, or message me on Tumblr [artistic-youtube-trash] (or just review). Please give me your input! If I get absolutely nothing in a month, I'm deleting both stories! Thank you and I apologize to anyone following these fanfictions for the lack of updates! **


	15. Update

Hi everyone! So it's been a month, and luckily, I've gotten all positive responses! I was honestly scared that people didn't like this fanfiction as much as they did, so thank you to everyone who has reviewed, messaged me, or emailed me for their input. I've decided to rewrite both stories, as everyone really wanted to see what happened. But first, I will upload the next chapter of Everyone Hates Me, since I thought it was cruel to leave off where I had. I'll try to write as much as I can of both stories as fast as possible, since everyone has been waiting so long. Thank you again to everyone who gave me their input! See you soon!

~mmbazb


	16. Everything I Could Ever Want

**Okay here's your next chapter! This will probably be the last, unless I feel absolutely compelled to continue it. Again, I appreciate each and every one of everyone's input. Thanks!**

**WARNING: This does contain mature content. If you'd prefer not to see that, please don't read.**

As Yao pushed the door to his room open, I felt that apprehension, but it was quickly dissipated by Yao slamming his mouth back into mine, sexual frustration evident in his passion. Yao pushed me onto the door, effectively shutting it, and placed his hands on my hips, subtly grinding into me. To an onlooker, the sight might have been a little strange, seeing as the small, lithe Chinese man was pinning a large Russian man on a door and making small moans fall from said Russian. And honestly, at the moment, I really didn't give a fuck. My mouth was uncontrollable, as moans continued to fall out of my mouth unabashedly, albeit, a bit abashedly, and Yao continued to tongue fuck my mouth until I pulled back, gasping for much need air.

"Y-Yao..." I murmured, "Please." I hid my head in his shoulder, my face probably turning a bright red. Yao himself huffed beside my ear, but froze when he heard my plea. And all of a sudden, I was seated at the edge of Yao's bed, said man in between my legs. The sight itself made me groan in desire, still not comprehending just how quickly we managed to move across his room. Yao sat forward on his knees, leaning forward to nuzzle the growing bulge in my jeans. I moaned again, louder this time, and watched as Yao drank in my reactions, enjoying seeing me aroused.

"Mm, Ivan..." He said, voice low and sensual, "Have I told you how much I love seeing you like this?"

I quietly whimpered, trying to stifle the mortifying noises I'd been making. "Yes, I think you have..." I said, still embarrassed by his words.

Yao nuzzled the bulge again, mouthing over the denim and causing me to moan, looking for that certain friction. "Hm, then I suppose I'll tell you again, because _damn_ do you look good, making those pretty noises for me." He said, not an ounce of shame in him.

I hadn't realized just how much Yao like to dirty talk, and that I also _really_ liked it up until that moment because I groaned loudly at his words, my pants growing tighter and tighter. "P-please…" I begged again, wanting that release so badly, teasing be damned.

Yao finally, _finally_, reached up to unzip my pants and I impatiently waited for him to slowly zip it down. Through my boxers, a visible wet spot had formed from the precum soaking through, and my cock was clearly straining against the fabric. I looked in another direction, a bit embarrassed of the state Yao was able to put me in, just from kissing and fondling. But Yao paid no attention as he pulled my pants down the rest of the way, discarding them in another place on the floor. I sat back, biting my lip. I felt extremely vulnerable, having my shirt already being taken off, and leaving me only in my underwear. And yet, Yao had yet to shed any one of his articles of clothing.

I didn't have time to think about it because then Yao was on me again, kissing the straining fabric withholding my arousal from springing free. I pinched my lips together to muffle a loud groan and refrained from bucking up into those pink lips. I felt his small fingers dip into the hem of my boxers, but before he moved to pull them down, he up at me with a concerned expression, and asked, "This is okay?"

With those pretty eyes, and the promise of what to come, did he really expect me to say no? But the thoughtfulness of his question nonetheless made me smile crookedly and reach my hand around to cup his face. "Of course." I said.

He smiled back at me, but it changed into more of a smirk as he slowly pulled my underwear down, finally allowing my achingly hard cock to spring free. The first thing he did was gape at it. After all this was the first time we'd seen each other's arousals, but did he have to be so shocked? A fog of awkward silence fell over us, and I squirmed uncomfortably.

Finally, Yao broke the silence. "It's so big..." He murmured, and I felt my face heat up impossibly more. But before I could say anything in return, he reached up the grab the base, giving it a few testing jerks. My head flew back, an extremely loud moan leaving my mouth. That seemed to excite Yao, as he gave it another few slow strokes and set up a stable pace. Pleasured sounds and pants flowed freely from me, my hips moving erratically to Yao's hand movements. I felt a warmth growing inside me, building up as Yao continued his ministrations, but suddenly Yao stopped, and I let out a pitiful whine, right on the brink of orgasm.

"Yao..." I moaned out, and looked down at Yao to find him with a questioning look on his face.

"May I?" He asked, and my brows furrowed, not comprehending what he was implying.

"What?"

He let out a small puff of frustration. "Ivan, can I suck your dick?"

I spluttered embarrassedly, my face the colour of a tomato. I wished he wasn't so blunt about it. But I still wanted it. "Y-yes, please."

A small smirk cross Yao's face, victory showing. He brought his face close to my throbbing cock and gently nudged it with his nose. I turned my head away, trying to look away, but my eyes betrayed me by staying on Yao's lewd face. He hovered over the tip, blowing cool air over it, wringing yet another whine from me, urging him to just fucking do it. He smirked again, and wrapped his lips around the head, sucking hard. I let out a wanton moan, feeling his tongue lick up the sticky precum and delve into the tip. And just as he was going down, further and further, I felt that familiar sensation of warmth spread through me.

I gripped his hair as gently as I could in the state I was in, and choked out, "Y-Yao… 'm gonna- ah… gonna cum-" I closed my eyes, riding on that edge, and I felt Yao pull off, but before I could complain, he was jerking me again, at a pace much faster than before, and finally I reached it.

My senses numbed as orgasm washed over me, my sight filling with stars. When it was over, I hunched forward, my chest heaving. When I finally looked up, Yao was looking at me, his eyes searching for some reaction, and all over his face and chest was my seed.

"O-oh! I'm so sorry, um… Do you have- Where are the tissues?" I spluttered, utterly embarrassed. Yao smiled a bit but reached around for the box of tissues that was on the bedside table. I quickly snatched a few from the box offered to me, and began cleaning the spilled seed off my poor boyfriend. "I'm so sorry..." I muttered, trying to wipe off all of the cum I could. Yao just smiled again, strangely silent. Once his face was as clean as I could make it, I looked around for my clothing, feeling a bit bare around the fully clothed man in front of me. But while I was looking about, I saw the straining bulge in Yao's tight skinny jeans. It looked horribly uncomfortable. Did he think I'm-? Am I _supposed to-_

"Oh." I said, ever the smart one.

Yao chuckled, rubbing my thighs soothingly. "You don't have to do everything I did, if you're not comfortable, Ivan."

I bit my lip and contemplated my options. I could 1. just give him a hand job or 2. suck him off like he had me. I quickly decided on the former, assuming I probably didn't know exactly what to do, and my embarrassment also got the better of me.

I slowly moved more towards the center of the bed and gestured for him to join me on the bed, a small plan forming in my mind. He slyly crawled onto the bed, sitting on his knees once he reached the center with me. I crossed my legs and patted my thighs, offering a seat. Yao happily complied, still eerily silent. I reminded my self to question him about that later, but for now, I was completely occupied with everything Yao.

I put my fingers in front of his zipper, and looked at him with raised eyebrows, a silent question. He nodded, a look of appreciation in his eyes. With Yao's legs securely straddling my hips, I unzipped his pants and took in the sight of his grey boxers, also straining against his arousal, and just as moist, if not more. I let a confident smile of my own surface as I cupped the hard bulge, a moan coming from Yao.

As my confidence grew, I began to rub him through the fabric, making more noises fall from Yao. Whether he was conscious of it or not, I had no idea, but Yao began to grind into my lap, and I felt my cock start to harden again. Damn this guy was hot.

I shoved his pants down further, and Yao aided me in taking them all the way off. The skin-tight boxers he was wearing fit him in all the right places, and I couldn't help but stare, especially at his rounded ass.

_I wonder what it would look like if I had my-_

Yao quickly snapped me out of my thoughts by rolling his hips into my lap, trying to make me focus on the current situation. Immediately, I gripped his ass, feeling the soft mounds meld in my fingers. Yao let out the loudest moan he has yet, and I knew I'd found a special spot. I groped the fatty skin, enjoying the way some of the skin would poke out between my fingers.

I felt Yao grind into my lap harder, and I quickly went to pull his underwear off, but left his shirt on, liking the way it fell over his hips. I gripped the base of his cock, outwardly appreciating the length of it. I knew my confidence was over the fucking moon, because I didn't think I'd ever been this lewd or dirty.

With the one hand jerking him off, I used the other hand the knead at his ass, grinding back into him now. My cock was now at full mast again, and I knew Yao was about to go over by the raising in pitch of his voice.

Feeling myself also get closer to edge yet again, I carefully laid Yao back onto the sheets, only stopping my ministrations for a second before continuing them and including rutting against one of his parted legs. I'll admit, I probably looked like a damn horny animal at that moment, but fuck if I didn't feel like it too. The pent up sexual frustration had been hindered for too long.

"Ivan- ah… gonna cum… ngh…" Yao managed through moans. I grunted an affirmative, coming close myself.

As Yao came, he rode against my hand, letting out high whines and cumming over both of our chests, and I followed suit, cumming on the inside of Yao's thigh. I fell forward, just bracing myself with my arms a bit to avoid crushing Yao. We both heaved, trying catching our breaths.

"Maybe… maybe I should have worn a condom..." I breathed, quickly starting to worry over the second mess I'd made on Yao.

Yao shook his head. "They… wouldn't have fit." He huffed. I looked at him, severely confused. Yao seemed to realize what he'd said as he turned a dark shade of red. "I um… bought some… but they're too small. Guessed wrong..." He muttered.

I tilted my head. He'd tried to guess my dick size? I couldn't help it, I let out a small chuckle, amused by his actions. Yao scowled and lightly pushed me, only making me laugh more. "Isn't it me who's supposed to be embarrassed?" I teased, gently running my thumb over his cheek.

His brows suddenly furrowed. "Yeah, why _weren't _you embarrassed?" I shrugged. "I think sex gives you confidence." He said, coming to some sort of a conclusion and smiling a bit. I just shrugged again.

He reached his arms out and pulled me down, allowing me to drape myself limply over his body. I sighed and cuddled into him contently.

"Ivan..." Yao said quietly, sounding like he was sad to say was he was about to say, "We have to get up, I'm sticky and hungry." I chuckled a bit at his hunger, but got up nonetheless, sitting back on my knees. Yao sat up on his elbows and seemingly assessed the situation. Once he got up, I silently followed him, where he led us to the bathroom. It honestly felt a little weird to walk around Yao's apartment butt naked, but it also made me feel a bit smug. _I _was the only one allowed to do that.

As Yao locked the door, he instructed me to turn on the water in the shower, and not to make it too hot. I complied, and when I was finished – and making sure that the water was 100% temperate – I watched Yao as he stripped his cum covered shirt and leave his body completely bare. He took the band from his hair and set it on the sink, his hair falling over his shoulders. I had the overwhelming urge to reach out and touch it, but I stifled it and let Yao get under the shower stream first, and following and shutting the curtains. We both washed each other, Yao working his adept fingers into my scalp and nearly making me fall asleep, and myself carefully scrubbing his body, not so subtly caressing a few of my favourite parts of his body. I still wasn't sure why I just got into the shower with him without even batting an eyelash, but I didn't regret it. Once we were finished in the shower, we made our way back into Yao's bedroom for myself to change into the discarded clothes and for Yao to find new ones in his dresser.

"Hey Yao?" I said, zipping my pants back up.

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

I'd said it without thinking, not really realizing what I did until I heard Yao stop what he was doing, but I made no move to take it back.

When I didn't receive an answer, I turned to Yao, not sure what to expect, and saw said man with an endearing look on his face, a warm smile gracing his features. I blushed and scratched the back of my neck, my confidence ebbing away as the steamy mood drifted away.

"I love you too." Yao said with a sure voice, and looking me in the eyes with that smile still on his lips. And he turned away, continuing with what he was doing.

Yeah.

This is everything I could ever want.

**Okay well there it is! This is probably the last chapter for this story, but I had a lot of fun writing this! Thanks to everyone who followed, favourited, and/or reviewed! Don't be too upset though. I'm going to rewrite this, and hopefully it will be a lot better. Thanks!**

**~HomozygousBean**


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